A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,I am after some general advice.. as I have been single for an age until recently. I met this guy, we had a rocky start.. and I really just don't know where his head space is. Like, i so enjoy him and his company.. so we hook up, and he's invited me out. But he is sooooo vague, and I txt him, and last week, he totally (from my point of view) ignored me, after we had been txtn throughout the nite, and I askd him if he wanted to get together the following nite and he didn't reply. But next day I txt and he is all like I'm blah, blah. basically I had to spell it out that I wanted to see him, and he was all like oh yeah sozz i forgot.. so I went to see him. Then on the friday, I txt him again, all good, then he like says he will be home, then next minute he is out at the pub. Grr I was upset, so I just said .. have fun. Txt him again.. and get no reply so I email him, and just said outright, if you not into me, that is okay I will leave you alone. Coz let's face it, I thought guys would want to see you 24/7? He replied and just said he was hangova and doesn't check his phone wen he hanging out in his room.. Oh i sorry if I look really dumb, but I do like him, and he has said he was happy to see me. So I thought maybe he just needs some space, or I should just get to know him a bit better, cos each time I do see him, he becomes more relaxed and open with me, so I figure from his point of view he mite need to know that I do really like him, as at the start it was a bit rough well I was on him, as I didn't know his intentions. But i do enjoy him, and I obviously good at forgiving him for being such a guy at times. Or is it that each person is different? Your thoughts would be appreciative.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2008): Hey guys, thanks for your answers.. yeah he not into me, and is a nasty peice of work and just glad that I found out before it was too late, meantime I have a dinner date with a new man, and that is all good.. PS. You are right, if you treat em mean they are keen thanks!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2008): Hey There,
First things first. Guys and girls alike want what they think they can't have. So, you should act a little more aloof. Don't respond right away when he messages you. Or say you're hanging out with someone else that night. It will drive him crazy, and make him more attracted to you.
Second, this will be vain if he's not attracted to you to begin with. So, you should figure that out. Here's a good resource for that:
http://www.creative-dating-ideas.com/signs-of-male-attraction.html
If you think he is, then give a little chase... Don't make it so easy on him, or he'll be turned off.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2008): Dear Poster
Yes, we are all different, but there is certain basics that you cannot overlook. Fact remains, a man is a hunter;
You need to stop "chasing" the guy; give him time and space, wait for him to contact you and to want to see you; at the moment the more you are chasing after him, the more you are chasing him away from you. Stop being so "desperate" for his attention and company. Guys don't like "clingy" girls.
If this guy is really "into" you let him do the phoning and texting; you are not doing yourself any good by making all the moves; no matter how much you like him, stop this behavior; let him do the "chasing"; stop calling him, wait for him to contact you.
Trust me, if he does not "chase" you, it is better you move on and find somebody that does value you and who is willing to make effort to contact you, who is wanting to spend time with you; you should not be doing the "chasing"; no matter how much you might like him, if he is not that "into" you; let it be, avoid humiliating yourself and getting hurt in time to come; take time out from this guy and see if he does come around and makes and effort to be with you.
Best wishes and lots of smiles.
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