A
female
age
36-40,
*essi030
writes: So, my situation is a tough one and a little confusing but here goes! Theres a guy (guy a) that was my high school sweetheart. We were crazy inlove but didn't work out because he had some growing up to do. We continued to talk every so often to stay close friends even when dating other people. About 3 years ago, he said we couldn't hang out because his new soon to be wife disapproved and him being a good man wanted her to be happy. So we only talked once every couple of months to stay in touch. Around that time, I met who(guy b) I felt was the new love of my life. He is a wonderful man. We moved in together right away and have been together for 3 years now. He's not close to his family but has become insanely close to my family. We got engaged 15 months ago and had a wedding planned for two months ago. Problem is, guy a divorced his wife and has a wonderful son and has grown up to be an amazing man and came back into my life a year ago as my friend. Guy a has also become very good friends with guy b. Slowly about 8 or 9 months ago, I really started feeling bored with guy b and scared of getting married because I was feeling very strongly again about guy a. When I talk to my family about it, they think I'm nuts because they love guy b so much, so I can't really talk to them. Recently, guy a told me about how in love with me he still is and wishes he never messed things up. He has a great job, is in college, owns a home, is close to his family, and is an amazing father. So, after being very confused, I called off the wedding. Now, I feel left with having to make a decision and don't know what to do. Guy a is more fit to my personality: exciting, spuratic, stubborn, outgoing, and just really makes me feel alive. We have so much history together and are very passionate about eachother. On the other hand, guy b is amazing too. He is sweet, goal oriented, in school, romantic, fun, patient with me. We have been together for so long and built a home together but I don't know how to be with him and stop thinking about guy a. Also, if I picked guy a, if I would regret it and miss guy b. They are both great men and I truly believe that I am crazy about both and both would love me unconditionally and could work out. Help!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Lilly Rose +, writes (28 April 2009):
Your a very lucky lady to have two good men, most women don't even get one!
but my advise for you is be with the one who you truely can be yourself with, who makes you laugh, who makes you smile when you think about them, and who makes you feel like an attractive women. Look at the pros and cons write them down if you have to....but i know deep down you already have picked one so listen to your heart and good luck!!! xxxx
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