A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hello!I'm 16 and female and I have a crush on one of my female teachers. Well, I haven't got her in any lessons at the moment, but she was my German teacher for two years. She seemed to like me and so it happened that we got to talk in lunchtime or after school once or twice a week. It was all right so far.But then, last year something changed. You must know, she hugged me two or three times before but I told her not to do it again. But, well, last year, I changed my mind, and (silly me) I told her I'd like her to do it again. Of course, that was wrong because she's a teacher. But she just did it and it felt so... well, I don't know how to describe it. But that's when I started having a crush, I think.Everybody told me it was wrong when she huged me so I asked her what she thought and she said she just did it because I wanted it and she also thought it was wrong and we should stop it. So that's what we did. I was really sad about it. I hoped the summer holidays would help me getting over her, but my feelings just got worse. After the holidays, I tried to hug her again but she just said: "Oh, come on, don't do that because you know it's wrong."I'm not talking to her anymore now because I told her I needed some time away from her, but it hurts so bad. Everytime I see her, I just wanna tell her how I feel but that wouldn't be helpful. She would think I'm crazy. I really don't know what to do anymore. Maybe someone is or was in a similar situation and can give me some advice.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOK, just for the record: I think I finally got over her. I thought I wouldn't survive but I did!
A
female
reader, visione +, writes (17 February 2010):
Take time to sort out your emotions, it never feels good to be rejected like that. But at least now you know what it feels like, and rejection in the future won't be as bad!
Respect her wishes though if she says no, look for positives in other aspects of your life and enjoy those to get her off of your mind. As time passes you'll slowly forget about her, and you'll only have fond memories left.
You'll be fine, but go ahead and let out those sad emotions now - it's healthy! Just don't stay sad for too long. :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionFirst of all, thanks for the answer.
But since I wrote my questions things got worse.
I wrote this question on a Sunday. Well, on the next day (Monday) when she saw me she said: "I need to talk to you. We can't go on like this. You can't send me text messages or phone me all the time!" (She gave me her mobile phone number two years ago, but I didn't phone her "all the time"!) But that was not all. She also said: "After all, you're just a pupil for me and nothing more than that. I think it'll be a good solution if we don't speak again until you can accept that." I just stood there and didn't understand. Well, I understood what she said but I couldn't believe it! And I still can't!
I think it wasn't just this one call that made her act out like that. Maybe I acted a little bit too obvious and she found out about my feelings. Maybe she just did the right thing then... But I'm really sad now. I've seen her a few times after this conversation and it hurts really bad to see that she's all right and I'm not! Thank God, I have no school this week so I don't have to see her.
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A
female
reader, visione +, writes (29 January 2010):
I think it's alright to have a crush on a teacher, but you shouldn't go any further than that. You two should respect each other wishes on no hugs. People change as they grow, you are still young. What you feel may just be a fantasy feeling, and that your attraction to her is deep respect and caring (like between mother and child), or maybe even admiring.
You should keep in contact with your teacher and just remain friends, it seems like a good relationship to keep on that level.
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