A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend of a year and a half broke up with me and i slept with someone else because i thought there was no chance that we would get back together. Now we are back together she cant get over it and keeps making me feel really guilty about it but it only happened because she broke my heart by ending it in the first place. I really want this relationship to work but she just cant seem to get past it. Any advice?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2010): I agree with q1605. I wouldn't be surprised if she's venting frustration at you about something she did too.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2010): If you want this relationship to work you and she are going to have to resolve this... if you can't do it alone, get some outside help, work through this issue and get over it. You were broken up- if you'd stayed broken up for 20 years and then gotten back together then what would she have expected?
Are you SURE you want to spend the rest of your life (or money) with this girl?
This is too much like a Seinfeld episode to be healthy.
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A
male
reader, iamaphony  +, writes (27 January 2010):
now is your chance to make this the defining moment of this relationship.
sit her down, explain what she did, explain what you did, and why. and if she can't move on, YOU CAN. and end it.
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A
female
reader, Dinkie +, writes (26 January 2010):
you need to make her feel secure and let her see you only want to be with her. But you need to explain to her that holding it over you makes it hard for you two to make things work if she knows it was when you were broken up and you make her feel like shes the only one for you then she will get over it
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A
female
reader, ImJustTrinity +, writes (26 January 2010):
I can totally relate to you as i've been in the same situation!
My boyfriend broke up with me, so i slept with somebody else. He then asked me back out, but when he found out, he said he didn't trust me.
I pointed a few things out to him.
First that i was feeling really low, and i felt rejected by the person that i loved.
and that feelings like this can make you do something you wouldn't normally do. All i craved for i suppose was affection from somebody.
He understood after that, and he began to forget about it, as we were happy together and i showed him how much i loved him.
Some people might say thats wrong, but when you get rejected by the person you love, it can sometimes make you do crazy things.
If it was just the once, and it wasn't a past gf, then you should just talk to her, and if you feel the same way i did, explain that to her.
(also, you weren't together, so she can't get EXTREMELY mad!)
Hope this helps honey.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (26 January 2010):
Well she needs to choose... she either forgives you and wants you back. Or she doesn't forgive you and can't be with you.
You need to tell her that you were single and she can't keep holding it over you and expect this relationship to work.
Good Luck!! xx
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