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female
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*aisyday
writes: i'm going through a divorse, i met this guy who is 14 years younger than me who was going out of his way to run into me and making strong eye contact but never asked me out, he told me he was busy and would have free time this summer, well, i seen him taking a girl to the show the other night and he looked very upset that i seen them together, my heart has been broken again, i'm just glad that nothing happened between us, i wouldn't want to hurt his girlfriend as my louse soon to be ex did to me! i refuse to even look at him when i see him now but he's still keeping tabs on me! how do i get over this heartbreak, should i try at least to be civil to him since were neighbors and live across the alley from each other or what?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2006): Dear, I'm trying to understand 'why' you are upset with this guy. Let's recap: You know this guy, you've both been sorta flirting, but he's never asked you out. You saw him dating another female and you are hurt-even saying " your heart is broken" ? How can your heart be broken...you really had no real substantial foundation of a LOVE relationship with this guy. He can date whom he pleases and so can you. You are overstepping the boundries here by claiming 'ownership, entitlement and betrayed feelings' over a guy, you 'only' flirted with. That's just not the way it works, hun. (maybe in junior high school but not in the adult world) Let's get this into perspective. He and you can flirt and make eye contact all you want....but he owes you nothing and you owe him nothing. If you think he's a cad, then carry on with life and get out there and find other's to date. But for goodness sake, don't give 'your heart and emotions' to some guy you flirted with. For you to be so upset over such a trivial incident, indicates to me, that you may have some deeper issues that need to be addressed and I don't think you are healed enough from the pain of divorce to be dating yet. So, what do you do next time, you see this guy. You behave classy, mature and nice. He's done nothing wrong to you.
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