A
male
age
36-40,
*townsfinest5
writes:Ok, complicated scenario. I was with a girl for over a year and a half. I started sleeping with another girl, who lives out of state and was only in town for a month or two, but my girlfriend didnt know. I ended up breaking it off with the first girl for the second girl, however the first girl had/has no idea that number 2 was the reason. It is now a full blown, long distance relationship where we see each other about every other month. The new girlfriend brought up the idea of a threesome. Luckily enough for me, she wants it with another girl. She told me this over the phone and as soon as she said it, i received a text from my ex (we occasionally talk, share advice, help each other out, but never anything sexual).I jokingly suggested my ex as the girl we do it with. Somehow it passed her approval and i was soon texting my ex asking if she was interested. Long story short, she is. Now my girlfriend is coming to town next week, and i feel like the craziest guy ever. Racking my brain trying to figure out if i should sleep with two girls at once. What i want to know is: What does it say about my now girlfriend that she is willing to get in bed with me and my ex, even though she lives about 1000 miles away, and my ex lives about 3 miles away. She isnt really worried or cautious to see me and my ex doing things as long as she is there. She really wants to be with a girl, and plans to do a bunch of sexual acts with her and i. Im stuck wondering if my girl is more interested in sexual pleasure than our relationship. She isnt worried that this can spark something up when she is way out of reach? help me out
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2009): Look... threesomes are mostly trouble. They sometimes work, but they end badly more often then they work out.
Adding an EX into the mix is NEVER, EVER a good thing to do. You need to remember... you broke up for a reason. And that reason doesn't just disappear because you have been apart for a while and you have a threesome with her.
Your ex might possibly be looking for some sort of revenge. She might not. But it is something that might is better avoided then delt with afterwards.
A relationship is doomed when it takes a THREESOME to keep it active. A threesome can benefit a realtionship when none of the love has gone, but the sex has become a little stale and it's two people wanting to spice things up.
If you really must havea threesome, don't use an ex. They are, as I said, an ex for a reason. Hire a decent call-girl who is not gonna have a single emotional attachment to either of you and will bolt the moment either you or your girlfriend does. She will be someone who is paid to do a job, and will make the night quite exciting and sexually charged, but for her thats all it will be. And thats all it should be for the two partners in regards to the third party.
Flynn 24
A
male
reader, dtownsfinest5 +, writes (3 March 2009):
dtownsfinest5 is verified as being by the original poster of the question ok. thanks for that. another thing i should add is that im actually starting to feel outed. a week ago they both hated each other. now my girlfriend keeps wanting her to join us in our phone pleasure, and they are friends on myspace all of a sudden. its like ive lost some of my luster to my own ex...
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A
male
reader, OmegaXF +, writes (3 March 2009):
 I can't tell you if your woman is more interested in sex more than the relationship because that is something that only you can figure out. But I can tell you she is very kinky and you might and probably will have a great sex life.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2009): I think you should take a chance, have fun, and practice safe sex. Set some ground rules that you can all agree on, and be honest always. Youth is a time for figuring out things about yourself, relationships and the world. Even if it doesn't go well, learn from the experience, never feel ashamed, and move on.
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