A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend goes in random moods and puts me down when she is in them. an example I started to put the recycling out while she did the dishes, I finshed went to sit on the sofa 20 seconds she joined me, and said "thanks for helping me wash the dishes never thought it would be like this when we lived together". I sat there confused then said "I offered to help but you said no its okay so i did the recycling" she then says whatever and spends the next hour in silence only answering me with a yes no or a hmmm. The next day there were 4 glasses on the counter so i washed them while she was watching tv, when i came into the oom to join her she said "were you washing the dishes? you should jsut leave them its pointless washing a couple of things" I sat there like what am i meant to do yesturday it was i dont help you wash them or contribute then when i do something you complain that i didnt do it your way. This happens with many things, i bought a bottle of wine with a cork instead of a twist top she spends the rest of the night in a mood i apologised countless times, she went to same shop the next day and found they only sell corked wine, she came in saying "i got more wine, the shop only had corked wine but i wanted that tonight anyway..." mood again!!. I feel scared to say or do stuff sometimes cause if i say something slightly wrong or do something that doesnt fit her way she gets mad at me. I love her to bits no one has ever made me happier then she has, but its slowly starting to bug me as im constantly thinking what have i done wrong even when she makes a mistake or does something wrong its aimed at me. She is away on a course for a couple of months so i wont be seeing her for at least a month until and we are both missing each other greatly. SOme of her close friends keep saying im a great guy and surprised i havent left her and as one of them said to me "one day you will open your eyes and youll see for real she treats you so badly compared to how you treat her" that coming from her close friend concerns me i dont want to leave her. What can i do? thanks
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male
reader, Advice_man  +, writes (17 January 2011):
 Your girlfriend's attitude is disrespectful and should be tolerated. Ok...you show understanding, we all have our bad days and that's fine. But even in our bad days, even if we talk bad or yel to our partner we then apologize for our behavior and try not to repeat again. You are afraid because if you say something wrong she will get mad at you?? Come on wake up my friend! Be a man, clear your position. Talk with her in a nice, polite manner and make it clear that bad attitude can no longer be tolerated by you! If she has a problem with you then she should discuss it with you in a nice way. Otherwise, if she is unwilling to cooperate you should leave the relationship. Do the right thing! Best wishes
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