A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I’ve been obsessed with a woman who I dated for several years. She had now returned to a former lover, that was a six year relationship. She is now engaged to be married to him. How do I help myself to get over her?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Original shiraz!  +, writes (26 July 2009):
Theres not a lot you can do, its one of those things that you cant control and your forced to let go of. It may not be what you want but its what she wants if you loved her then you have to respect that, however hard you find it theres always a way forward, maybe not with her but in time you will move on. She has and you need to. Marriage is a huge commitment if shes agreed to it then shes saying yes im ready for this and she wants this with this man, you cannot blame her for moving on with her life you need to do the same with somebody else. It worries me that you use the word obsessed to describe the situation and how you felt, the word loved would of altered things sligtly, its obvious your struggling in letting go yet i cant help but feel things are deeper, if there is more to this and you are finding it impossoble to move foward please dont hesitate to contact me by mail or by another post which ever suits. Acceptance is hard to handle, its your first step to change, change can be good even if you dont want it. You can help yourself by starting a fresh, set goals/targets and stick to them, for example start going out and socilising with friends get back to normality with a different outlook one that is designed for you. Best of luck
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