A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:well i am 21 and i live in new york... i been here all my life and i grew up with " the normal ideas and things a child grows up with" i played with cars and was a typical boy... and now i am so confused because i love painting my nails and doing makeup the goth look i love it... i am a personest i don't date base on region or sex or even politics, i rate soully on the persons personalty.. i have been dating for 4 to 5 years now and can't find someone who understands me... and i have had hard times in the sex area due to some well "past events" i was raped when i was younger. and women not all but most don't understand how i can be so emotional..am i a bad person?why cant i stay in a relationship?why am i gender confused?i have so many ideas and questions
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (3 March 2012):
 No off course you are not a bad person you have just not found the right woman for you yet. If you are confused about your gender then I would suggest you go and speak to a therapist. They can also help you over come your past issues with being raped. It is a hard thing for anyone to have to deal with, and if you haven't dealt with that in your life then it is going to make you struggle with relationships. You need to learn how to handle that so talk to someone about it and see how they can help. As for confusion about your gender, do you feel like you want to be a woman or could it be a case that it is just the style you are in to at the moment? If it is well then don't be afraid to be yourself, others might not understand you but if you know who you are then it makes it easier to deal with. Everybody is different and emotional can be a good emotion to have so look at it positively. Just remember if the girls you have been with don't understand you, then you are just not meant to be.
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