A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Quick question..I love my boyfriend very much, so much that we're looking into getting a flat together, however i have 1 slight issue..How do i deal with his gaming obsession, there is this one game he plays that, basically, i actually get jealous of. It's an online game and so he is friends with the people on there, i do realise its just a game, but its the fact that it sometimes feels like he's more interested in that and the people on it, than he is about me. I always think the people on there (people he's never met before) know him better than i do! :(I'm worried that if we move in together he's going to think he can just play it all the time cause he won't have to worry about whether he's coming to see me or i'm going to see him, cause i'd always be there.Please help!Any advice would be wonderful! Thank youuuu!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice! Should hear back about this flat this week, so excited! :) x
A
male
reader, Yos +, writes (8 August 2010):
It sounds like he's really a good guy, so you two should do more than fine. Just make sure you can talk about this subject openly, and try do to it in a way that's not accusatory: that doesn't make him feel defensive.
A good tip for this is to start all your sentences about it with "I feel...". For example, rather than saying:
"you are playing too much of that game"
you can say...
"I feel you don't want to be with me when you play that game so much".
Saying it that way makes him think more of your feelings, rather than being told off.
Good luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNot quite World of Warcraft but similar.
We have spoke about it before, and i've said to him before how i feel, that i feel he likes the game more than me, but he always says thats not true, and that he'd give up gaming for me.
He's a really lovely guy, means everything he says, and i'm just saying that, he's very sensitive about certain things. And if i've ever brought up the gaming issue, he says the same everytime, that he loves me more than the games and would give up anything for me, including gaming.
But thats not exactly what i want him to do, this will probably sound selfish, but i'd just like a little more attention from him. :(
I can't wait to move in with him though, then i can be with him all the time (with the exception of work).
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A
male
reader, Yos +, writes (7 August 2010):
He might think that, hopefully not.
I suggest you discuss this with him before you move in with him. Ask him how he sees his gaming going.
Then if you're happy to with his answer, get him to promise / agree it.
Having said that, even if he agrees, do you believe he can stick to it?
The game sounds like World of Warcraft
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