A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok imma keep this plain and straight to the point. My man likes oral sex just like any other man. I like givin to him. My only problem is that I really can't get it own my throat just yet. I can suck it really good but deep throating is very scary to me. I know the first thing youre gonna is say is RELAX but in all honesty...I relax but I guess its when I try to make it go down deeper in my mouth...I get scared...really scared. So I dont know what to do to mmake it go away. I can put my finger on top of my gag reflex and dont gag...but when he is in my mouth that deep...I gag...I dont have any numbing medicine and I really really would like any advice on how to do this. Oh and if this helps, eveerytime i do it, im from an angle that on the side not straight in front of him. could that be a problem?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2011): ummm... ok this will sound wierd 'cause im a guy but i hear tell (always wanted to say that) that if you take your left index finger and squeze down on your left thumb the gag reflex goes away but i havent done that soooo... yeah but if you arent comfortable with it dont do it
GOOD LUCK
A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (10 November 2011):
 Your 16-17.... The legal age of consent in the USA is usually 18.
Why are you trying to deep throat this guy. Why isn't it enough that you are giving him oral sex. Giving a guy deep throat won't make him love you anymore. In fact it usually makes him respect you less.
There are ways to learn to deep throat, but it is usually something learnt over time. It takes practice.
Hell, your body is still growing, you don't stop growing until your in your 20's. It's not surprising you find it difficult.
mmmmm.. Trying to deep throat at 16-17, what will you be doing by the time your old as me? What you are doing at the moment should be enough. The rest will come in time with practice, control of breath and trust built from a strong loving relationship.
Only one more thing.. I wonder if your boyfriend is as worried about your pleasures as you seem to be about his. Might we see him on dear cupid asking about how to give YOU wonderful oral sex.
Most women do not know how to deep throat. Many women do not even do oral sex. Pornography makes it seem that all this is normal and natural and something everyone does, but it isn't. Women in porn are paid to deep throat strangers, and have sex with so many men and this is how they learn.
??? Numbing medicine... sigh.. (shakes head)
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 November 2011):
 so don't do it.
I don't deep throat... I gag too much
get him nice and wet... use your hand to meet as far down as your mouth can go and make sure he' all encased in mouth and wet hand... it will work fine and no gagging or choking...
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (10 November 2011):
 I think this is something you learn with practice, if you are determined to do it. Alternatively you can't ever do it, as your gag reflect is natural, and it isn't always a good idea to go against what your body decides...
What I wonder about it why on earth do you want to deep throat him? It's unpleasant for you, makes you scared etc. Just stop trying so hard, don't go any deeper than YOU feel comfortable with. After all you are a loving girlfriend and sex, of any nature, is a two way street. It's supposed to be enjoyable for you as well, otherwise what would be the point? You're not a hooker providing a service to a paying customer. So don't try to act like it either.
If it's uncomfortable, just stop doing it. He's not missing out on amazing experiences, it should already be a great and bonding experience to share this with you. I also think you need to be careful and not fall into the trap that many young women fall into: they make it all about the man and his pleasure. Screw that. Sex is always a joint action, something you do TOGETHER, and should never solely be about the man's pleasure (or woman for that matter, but this tends to be a female problem, we make it all about the man).
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A
female
reader, mervy  +, writes (10 November 2011):
 Ok, so first of all being to the side may actually be helpful if he is curved in any direction. Think about how your throat looks (curves downward) try and work out which will be the best direction. For me, if I sit on the right side facing his toes, it's so much easier.
Secondly, even though it's very unsexy, THINK ABOUT SOMETHING VERY BORING! I used to think about doing the washing up, or the like. Until you're practiced, you don't want to be thinking about what your'e doing (just don't tell him that!), for me it brings on the gag.
You don't want to try getting it in all the way, though it's a good start if you can get your fingers down your throat. Go really slowly, and as soon as you feel a gag coming on, come back up. There's no reason to stick it out. You're right, relax, and breath out as you go down so you're not worried about choking. Keep your rhythm in time with your breathing.
I can now get my nose all the way to his stomach and hold it there for as long as I can hold my breath, but I didn't learn overnight.
Remember, if it all comes down to it, and it's too scary, nobody said you have to!!
Use your hands too and I swear he won't even notice!
Good luck!!
xx
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