A
male
age
41-50,
*rigger6105
writes:hi everyone,i've recently been split up from my ex gf for about 2 weeks now, we were separated for a month before 2 weeks when we got back together. she is the type that is very jealous, insecure, and dreads the future with me, she always told me that i am the best thing that has every happend to her, and that i'm the first man she's ever loved, i am 27 and shes 19, lately shes been confused abt being with me, cause of the stage i am in my life, she thinks that i'm at the point in my life where i want to get married and have kids, well that is true and all, but it was never really a topic of discussion, she just assumes it that way, now i've told her that i am in no hurry for that part in my life, that i'd wait, but since we've been split up for 2 weeks, she talks about that i should find someone that wants what i want, adn i shouldnt be with her, last night we spoke online and she brought up the topic of kids, telling me that she thinks she would be an unfit mother, and doesnt want her kids to have the mental issues as she has(depression). i told her i think its cuz you dont wanna ruin ur body, reason for that being said , its cause she has this idea of becoming a model, trying to be all glamuorous and all. if that her forte then i support her for it, for 2 weeks now i have closed off all forms of communication but periodically she would send me text messages, and i'd give her 1-5 words answers , reason for that is cuz she requested time apart and space, so im granting that outta respect for her, but why does she insist on talking to me still? she tells me she wants to take me off myspace and facebook, but yet she hasnt, i love this girl with all my heart, when we first met , we clicked instantly, basically i was her savior. tought her alot of things, but ever since january of 09, shes just changed. to my knowledge, i believe this is just a phase that shes going through given her age of being 19, she lacks self esteem/ confidence . has a stutter problem like i do, and she even doesnt like when i talk good about her breasts . her cup size is a, shes only 5'1 very petite. i love the way she looks, but lashed out at me for telling her the truth about her breasts, the truth being i think there getting bigger and i love them the way they are, but she insists there too small. and wants natural enhancers to make them bigger like her middle sister =/ this angers me inside cuz no matter what i say or do to make her feel better i can't win!does anyone have any advice as to what is going on with her ?if you do please share so i may have closure on this =(thank you kindly, i'll provide additional info by request to help this along
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male
reader, trigger6105 +, writes (14 September 2009):
trigger6105 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell as an update to this forum, we got back together may 29th 2009 an she recently left me again august 29th 2009, 3 days before our 1 yr anniversary. that saturday, i had asked to see her phone cuz i knew she was talking to another guy on facebook, i seen there conversations and everything, even see his cell number, so when i got the phone in my hand his name and txt msgs were deleted , so thats lie #1 we park at our favorite spot, and we start talking and she spits off with the same crap about wishing we can be flirty friends again like she proposed 5 months ago,that made me angry cuz u cant wish for past things anymore, its happened its done and this is now! is what i told her.i asked her to login to her facebook accnt and prove to me that shes not talkin to another guy on there, since she couldnt do it.she takes the promise ring off her finger and gives it back, days later i asked y couldnt u tell me the truth, and she told me that i would assume the worst, well FYI i only assume when i feel something is wrong, cuz when ur use to ur love sending u kissy pics or good night msgs and it stops, that routine has been broken, so ofcourse ur gonna assume esp. when there distant from you.well she tells me that she wants to live her life and wants to figure out her destiny, career, and she still thinks shes keeping me from having a family cuz shes uncertain of having kids, when i told her ample times that im in no rush for that, ugh this hurts to tlak abt it but i cannot keep it bottled in anymore, so the other day she deleted me off her myspace and facebook sites, cuz she told her sister that she didnt want to see me talking to other girls on there.but yet she'll flirt around with another guy online, jsut cuz this guy made a comment on her one facebook pic, now shes all googlie eyes for this bastard. anyone have an opinion on this matter?
thanks
A
male
reader, trigger6105 +, writes (2 April 2009):
trigger6105 is verified as being by the original poster of the questiondear davo, i do break contact with her, but someway some how she manages to spark a convo either on line or my phone lol. i kno she keeps tabs on me thru facebook and myspace.i periodically update it just to show how happy i am with out her. just to make her think a little ya kno?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2009): dude one advice and the only advice that will work, is to go NC (NO CONTACT) Do this for as long as it takes untill she contacts you regarding her emotions/issues. Do not contact her. Do not say anything untill she makes the first move. How do i know this will work? because iv been through this before. However if she doesnt contact you, or does not try to work things out then im sorry to say that it was never ment to be. Move on... but if she does, congrats! This will take time and you will find it very hard, but its the only sane thing to really do. If you try talk to her more and preasure her it will only drive her away and distant.goodluckDavo
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