A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I know this is long. I'm sorry, but there is this guy, i have been friends with benefits with for over a year now. I started to fall for him and when i told him he didn't really say anything, but we kept are thing up. He has always been there for me and we even called each other best friends. We always talked about each others current boyfriends and girlfriends. After we were both single we would hook up when ever.We talked about dating many times and he told me he could fall in love with me before an what not, but i turned him down because at the time he was in love with a girl trying to get over her. I didn't want him to hate me if she were to decide to go back to him. He still loves her and is on and off with her, but her parents don't like him.Three months ago today, he stopped talking to me after we hung out. He told me he was falling out of love with the girl and i was shocked (i thought that might of played a part in why he left me). That monday, i texted him happy birthday. He never texted back, so i just took that as he was through. I left town recentely and before i left he texted trying to find out why i left and wanted to hang out before i left or when i come back. I really do love him and i know he does care. I have tried to walk away from him many times, but its either he comes back to me or i go back. I'm lost. I don't know what to do anymore? Help.
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (16 February 2011):
 You get some self control and walk away for good.
You two have nothing been but FWBs, if he liked/loved you then he would have more with you than just casual sex. Casual sex doesn't equal love. Your problem is you went against the cardinal rule in FWB and started developing feelings for him. So you did want any woman would do and told him, however he did nothing about it because he likes your little arrangement.
Most women can't handle FWBs, because we associate sex with feelings (even casual sex)..but that's not the case with FWBs, no strings attached, fuck buddies. There are no feelings involved in casual sex. Sex is just sex.
Anyways, it's extremely rare that a FWB turns into a relationship. Even if it does happen it's a very short lived one.
Let it go, stop falling into the vicious cycle of FWB, it won't be anything more than just sex. Don't you think if he cared and wanted more he would have told you by now??
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