A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been having sex with a friend of mine No Strings Attached for a month now. During this month, we've gotten to know each other and we really became great friends. I knew what I was getting myself into because since when does friends with benefits work out? I have developed feelings for him but he reminds me everyday that he will never have feelings for me in that way. To top it all off, I remind him of his ex. Yesterday, he told me he wanted to stop our little friends with benefits thing and just be friends....Honestly. I can't do it. I want him still. I'm setting myself up for disaster but after all the dinners, talks, and stuff we did, I don't understand how he could NOT have those feelings for me. All my friends say it looks like he really likes me but yet, he tells me all the time it'll never happen. I'm just lost and confused. I don't know if I should just let him go or if I should stick around being his friend.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2011): I feel so sorry for you. I was in the same situation for a year and a half and it completely shattered my heart.
I know it's hard to understand how you can be so close to someone and them not care about you but it is completely possible. For some guys, sex is just sex.
I think you should definitely stop sleeping with him and don't be his friend because it may slip back into something more, and being around him may just make you want him more, hurting you.
I don't know why you started a FWB thing with him, but I don't advise doing it in the future. Somebody always gets hurt.
Good luck!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2011): This is why FWB is never a good idea.
It almost always ends up with someone getting hurt.
This is because humans cannot keep sex without emotion. Not for a long time anyway. Eventually feelings creep in.
Perhaps he felt he was beginning to get to emotionally involved for sex to be part of it. And he felt it would be dishonest to continue.
You'll only know if you talk to him about it. But remember, there absolutely no such thing as no strings attached. There are always strings, even if you can't see them.
Flynn 24
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