A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my ex dated for 2 months. We had a great relationship, it was fun, cute, and made me really happy. His friends are friends with my friends, and we always hung out. It worked out great. And before we dated me and him were great friends too. He decided to end things back in December, and it was hard for me. He said he just needed some time to think, and wanted to know if we could just be friends for now. At first we didnt really talk at all, but it was hard because our friends were friends and we all still wanted to hang out. So at first we kept it strictly friends. But gradually as time went by we just became friends with benefits. He knows i still have feelings for him and he still has feelings for me too. But he told me he just cant see us in a relationship; But its been about a month or so and we've just been friends with benefits. He treats me like his girlfriend, we hang out every weekend, alone or with friends and i just dont know what to do. I'm the only girl he's always with and i dont understand why he just wants to be friends with benefits. He does the usual boyfriend stuff, arms around me, kiss me, hold me. We text all day everyday, and at school we're always together. We've never had sex, i'm a virgin. But You know we "fool around" as friends with benefits. But i dont know what to do. How long is this going to last? Do i keep it up? I like him a lot and care about him so much but i dont know if this is healthy or not.... ? :-/
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2011): You dont understand why he wants to be friends with benefits???...Er because of the benefits of course......Stop trying to confuse and deceive yourself he has already told you the truth...What are you coming here to ask us?...If there is more to this than what it is....Kissing you, holding you and hanging out is not all that makes up 'boyfriend stuff'.....That boyfriend stuff is all in your head.....I suggest you stay away from him before the temptation to have sex beccomes too much ....Then you will really think you are in a serious relationship but the truth will be you are not and you will end up hurt ..
I'll tell you what to do..Stop the benefits and leave this dude well alone...For your own sake and to protect your heart.....Take this as a warning before it goes any further and you set yourself to get hurt
A
female
reader, Libra1963  +, writes (7 March 2011):
 He needs to make it clear what he wants from you. Either he openly admits that you are his girlfriend or you go out with someone else. Dont let him use you. How do you know he's not going to jump into the arms of someone and then say to you, we were only friends - would that not hurt?
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A
male
reader, sebaslookingforward  +, writes (7 March 2011):
In my opinion this doesnt sound too healthy because he is probably not taking things seriously and using you for some pleasure even if it's not something sexual. He probably will do this until a new girl comes by for him. And by then you could be totally shattered and heartbroken but at the same time he can say "I didnt cheat". I hope you get back together. If that doesn't happen, move on, but don't stay in this situation.
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