A
female
age
30-35,
*razyforhim
writes:we have been friends with benefits for a year, the agreement was not to sleep with anyone else, he is not ready for a relationship, during the time obviously we would get into a few arguments but it would cause me not to sleep with him, he did start being more caring and really sweet towards me, it felt like we really were in a relationship even tough we weren't. He got a job where he had to drive for weeks nationwide, during the time we would text each-other everyday and he would always tell me how much he misses me.Within 4 1/2 weeks of him being on the road he sends me a text saying that he wants to be only friends and how he lost feelings for me, I was in shock and hurt, I was in tears for days. But we continued messaging each-other as friends. Then a week after he sends me a text asking me if i want to start having sex again as soon as he gets back. Why is he doing this to me? What is going on?
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (14 April 2012):
 He ain't doing anything to you, at the end of the day he never committed to you, you both where only a booty call. Sleeping with him for a year does not mean that he is going to eventually want a relationship with you. If he did he would have done it long before now. He is getting what he wants and therefore he is happy. You shouldn't have sex with him so easily. To him you are never going to be more than a person to have fun with, he does not view you as girlfriend material. While he was away he probably met someone and decided to text you so he could get with her, but the moment he gets back he wants to start having no string sex with you again. He doesn't care about you, he is using you, but he is not doing anything wrong because you went in to this agreeing to the arrangement. Get out now while you can because you are emotionally involved now and you will get hurt.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (13 April 2012):
 FWB only works if you can keep your emoitions out of it.
If a guy can have sex with you (FWB) for a whole year but can't commit to a realrelationship, then it's because he sees you as a booty call not GF material. When you keep sleeping with him, he gets what he wants without having to really work it.
HE wants you for sex. Other then that he doesn't give a rats ass.
I would suggest you let him go, stop having contact and try and work out within yourself WHY you thought this arrangement was a good idea for you. Did you think the longer you two slept with each other the sooner he would realize what he had right in front of you? Even after a year of "just" sex?
Honey, he is a user, and you... let him use you.
Don't sleep with a guy, just to sleep with a guy. And don't go into any kind of "arrangement" thinking you can change the guy, make him love you.
Drop the dead weight.
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