A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Im really worried about my friend. Has anyone had a friend who suffers from really bad depression. He is 17 and I have only known him pesonally for about a year, but he has litterally been depressed every single minuite of everyday. His very quiet, almost mute, but only around other people, he only really talks to me because I fancied him and got to know him, and now we've become really good friends, which I think made him happy for a while because no one has ever done that before. His come onto some strange habits aswell, he does everything in multiples of five. volume settings on the tv have to be a multiple of five, the ammount of items on a hard surface have to be multipules of five ect. And his so paranoid of people, he thinks that everyone hates him, and wants to harm him in some way. Iv'e been ignoring him for a few days because its all getting to much for me. I just wondered if anyone had any advice on how I talk him into getting help.
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female
reader, Jessica2 +, writes (14 July 2009):
I'm mildly bipolar and I too suffered from serious depression, except that I'm a lot better now (I'm 24). When I was 17 it was hell for me, at that age the increase dosage of hormones affects brain chemicals and it makes any sort of mood disorder worse. Depression hits the hardest during those teen years if you are depressed to begin with. I know it must be incredibly frustrating and you feel like there's nothing you can do, even if he doesn't show it, but just by the virtue of you being there and listening to him is HUGE. The last thing a seriously depressed person can handle is feeling completely alone and having no one of who cares for him. His reality is distorted, he projects his insecurities and fear of rejection on others, that is common for a depressed person. Perhaps he has been deeply hurt and harmed by others before?
It sounds like he has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder too, I can't help you there, I don't have that and I don't know anyone who has that... sorry
Don't tell him directly that he should see a therapist/psychiatrist, sometimes that will push the person further, he might take it the wrong way. You can only help him if he wants help.
Try to find out what is the cause of the depression if there is any (sometimes it's only due to chemical imbalance), if you have ANY inclination that he is suicidal then please tell his family!!!
It sounds like you are being a great friend, but I'm not sure that he's ready for a relationship at this point even if he fancies you too, it won't be good for either of you. Please continue to be there for him, don't give up, when he is older he'll look back and be thankful because he had you to help him through the hard times. Good luck!!
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