A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Two years ago I started secondary school the most popular girl everybody loved me but later my so called bf started spreading lies about me just because the guy she liked liked me. Now two years on despite the fact she's going out with the guy and has ruined my life she still trying to stop me from being popular again. For instance she told my boyfriend horrible lies and then flirted with him in front of me. She aslo told me netball practice was cancelled so I couldn't make the team, spilt acid down my skirt, took a picture of me in my bra whilst we were changing and is just mean to me despite the fact when she started everyone hated her but because she was friends with me she was safe. What should I do???
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female
reader, LLindy87  +, writes (3 September 2010):
 I have two things to say.
firstly, this girl is clearly threatened by you. Pay her no attention and don't give her what she wants. If people are dumb enough to believe her lies then they aren't really seeing the real you anyway. When someone tells you something she said about you just state calmly "she can say anything she wants, doesn't make it true" I know its hard when you're 13-15 years old to take that approach, but being the bigger person is usually the right road to take. Don't give her the reaction she wants, she wants to tear you apart and have more 'power' than you.
secondly, learn that life isn't about being liked and popular. If you keep this approach you will become a people pleaser and thats not always a good thing. Wouldn't you rather have friends who love you for you and not just have friends as more of a collection for status? Once you're done with middle/high school you will find out which of those friends were real and which were just friends by location.
...also, she dumped acid down your shirt? what kind of acid????????????
A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (3 September 2010):
Hi there. It sounds like she likes to be the centre of attention and will do just about anything to get that attention.It also sounds like she has a low self-esteem. Sometimes, these non-confident people will try to elevate themselves by putting others down, believing they are actually making themselves appear to be better than they are. It's totally the wrong way to go about it.All they need to do is to first stop knocking others, and then to genuinely start feeling good about themselves by believing they are already perfect as they are. Then not accepting crap from anyone. It's all attention seeking behaviour.Don't allow yourself to take any crap from her either (or anyone else for that matter), and also don't hang around with her in your free time between classes or outside of school. Just ignore her altogether. Do not stoop to her level. Show her that you are a better, more sconfident person than her and don't try to do anything to sabotage her either, that's counter-productive. Just don't count her as one of your friends anymore. Even if she tries to make you hers. She is using you for her own gain.After all, she was hanging around with you in the first place because nobody liked her and she thought that your popularity might rub off on her a bit. I don't think that quite happened, did it really? She was clearly very jealous of you and still is, otherwise she wouldn't be acting this way or even feel a need to do so. Don't let her.You are so much better a person than she is and remind yourself of that constantly. She's not worth getting upset or angry over. Life is too short.Take care and best wishes.
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