A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,I arrived in US three weeks ago. I'm Indian Muslim . I'm 28. My wife is also 28 Recently, I bumped into my Ex”L” while jogging and she lives just one mile away from my wife house. She was also American and dumped me four years ago. Just after one year, I met my current wife on internet. We got married in overseas 14 months ago. Today, I bumped into her again and she asked me to relocate myself from this town as she does not want to see me everyday. She said, I deliberately, rented apartment here just to make her uncomfortable. I didn't rent this apartment, my wife did it. Also “L” was living in different state four years back when we were in a relationship and never thought she would move to the state where my wife has been running business for last 2 years. Now I think this is a golden opportunity to make her life miserable being so close to her .I can't get over the fact that she dumped for absolutely no reason and I can't get over that thing but being bad is something that is not in my nature. She is still single and wondering if she would have dumped someone else as well? Should I discuss with my wife that we need to get out of here? If she asks me why? Then what should be my answer ?Because I have always said to her that she is my first serious relationship and kept my past hide from her . Also, there was no need to mention first love when we entered into relationship as (L) became a relic of past for me then. Why my life is so complicated ? It happened naturally ? Or I have made it complicated for myself? What should I do now?Please tell me what to do! Thanks!
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female
reader, llifton +, writes (1 August 2013):
 you posted this just a couple days ago. you got good responses. i think you should follow that advice.
A
male
reader, CJH  +, writes (31 July 2013):
 Your first problem is that you're not open and honest with your wife, in fact you've lied to her.
Whilst I agree that there is no need to give her chapter and verse on your past, actually telling her she is your first "real relationship" does leave the poor woman with an inaccurate picture of you doesn't it?
Living a mile from the ex shouldn't really be a problem but of course it is for two reasons as far as I can see:
1) As stated above, you've weaved a web of lies about your past and now you are at risk of getting found out.
2) You clearly still have feelings for the ex (good or bad) and they seem to be messing with your head.
How should you handle this? Be honest with your wife right now and face anything that comes up together.
How I think you "will" handle this? By telling more lies and wondering somewhere along the line "why is my life going wrong".
Seriously. Look at yourself and your actions so far.
The answers are all in the next mirror you look into.
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