A
male
age
41-50,
*_m.what.i_m
writes:My best friend started dating this girl years ago. My gf at the time and her were bffs. My friends gf and i had this chemistry that is so lustful and exciting. We would mess around a bit and eventually it came out in the open. We admitted guilt and my buddy never even phased him. Thereafter they got married and life went on. A decade passed with little to no contact and i always had that feeling about her. Recently we have been catching up. I am a new bachelor and they r still married. Anyhow it happens its mutual still and strong as ever. I cant stop thinking about het and we text regularly with no shortage of flirting. What should i do from here? Get more intimite.....?
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best friend, flirt, friend's wife, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2015): This gives new meaning to the phrase keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
A
male
reader, dougbcoll  +, writes (16 January 2015):
 What a buddy you are !!! so you want to steal, take, cheat, whatever you want to call it from your "buddy".
with friends like that your buddy needs to do back ground checks on who he lets in his house.
so you want to steal his wife for some fun on the side and then return her after you are done, maybe hoping he want care or does not notice.
it looks like you are looking out for no.1 you don't care what that will do to him, or his wife, or their marriage on down the road.
i am sorry but i call that being a jerk.
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (15 January 2015):
 No, you don't get more intimate. You back off and leave his wife alone! That's what you do. Do you sincerely have no qualms with this in your head? No slight semblance of guilt?? You don't do that to people. Back off.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (15 January 2015):
 By all means, make it a three-way with your best friend and his wife. Then your betrayal's all the in the open right there, and you can all live polygamously ever after.
/sarcasm.
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A
female
reader, Midnight Shadow  +, writes (15 January 2015):
 That's the link I was going to post, Honeypie.
Really, OP. How could you be so selfish and cruel to do this to your best friend of all people?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 January 2015):
 Stop thinking with your dick, sir.
You are a sucky friend. And if she is still interested she is a sucky wife.
Read this post from a man who's WIFE cheated on him with his brother:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/im-devastated-to-find-out-my-wife-and.html
If HIS pain doesn't make you see what you are proposing and thinking is NOT OK, then you need some serious counseling time, a BRAND new moral compass and a huge dose of common sense, you are sincerely lacking.
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A
female
reader, Sincerely Yours +, writes (15 January 2015):
 I think you should control yourself, find a single girl. Would you make a decision to be a bad friend, cheat, lie, breakup a marriage?
I advise you to make a heathy decision.
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A
male
reader, SensitiveBloke +, writes (15 January 2015):
 You are newly-single so are probably desperate for a bit of action, but going with someone else's wife is a no-no. This can only end badly and people will be hurt.
Find someone else to flirt with who's actually available.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (15 January 2015):
 Why don't you ask her husband for his opinion seeing he was, according to you, not phased the last time you and his wife messed around?
Maybe he was prepared to forgive her once but twice means the end of their marriage, or maybe he will be totally not phased again. He might even give you carte blanche but you wont know until you ask him.
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A
female
reader, Midnight Shadow +, writes (15 January 2015):
What you should do here is have some respect for your friend and you should be acting like one. No decent person flirts with their friend's spouse and considers taking it further.
Either drop all contact with the woman, drop all contact with both (to avoid this happening again) or own up to your friend that you and his wife are being selfish and are flirting behind his back. Just because you don't think it phased him TEN YEARS ago, doesn't mean it didn't and doesn't mean it wouldn't now. If it wouldn't phase him, he wouldn't have married her because he presumably loves her and wants to be with her.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf +, writes (15 January 2015):
Yes...get more intimate with your buddy's wife. After all, if she was your wife, you wouldn't mind one of your friend getting intimate with her right???
It's not happen to you, because you are single...wonder why?
The fact that you have no respect for your buddy and his marriage, says alot about you.
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