A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Often my friends flake on me, sometimes they don't stick to their word or suddenly something comes up and they can't stay with their commitments. This is causing me real problems and upsets me because I feel like I can't rely on them or sometimes even trust them. Its a recurring thing that happens 70% of the time. What should I do? I've tried speaking to them and they promise to keep to their word and it happens again. How should I deal with this situation? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2009): Thanks Sammi star, thats real helpful. I agree when someone lets you down for the umpteenth time, its better to cut your losses and put them in a place where they are your friend but you accept everything is a loose arrangement. This particular friend flakes on everyone, do I explain to them that its hard to be friends with someone, when you never really know where you stand? I think I'm pretty much his last friend and he even used to flake on his girlfriend. He seems to want his friendships all to be on his own terms i.e. he'll call me everyday and want to make jokes but when it actually comes to meeting up he's all over the place and cant seem to organise himself. But when he is with his family its family time, and sometimes he'll just ignore calls. This is fine and dandy accept he'll call me at random hours when it suits him. What should I say and do?
A
female
reader, sammi star +, writes (16 May 2009):
 I had this same problem with my group of friends but I was younger than you at the time, in my teens. They'll never change. Fair enough, sometimes life gets in the way as we get older and we have more commitments but you shouldn't expect your friends to let you down 70% of the time! I know it's difficult to walk away but when you meet new people that will be there for you, ones you can actually rely on to stick to their word, you'll be so glad that you did. Good luck x
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