A
female
age
41-50,
*aylaLove
writes:Ok I have quite a few issues with my boyfriend of 4 years. Firstly, is it normal to live with 2 roomates while in a serious relationship? We could not afford a place of our own so we live with 2 (almost) complete strangers, and I don't see an end to this! I am not happy with this situation but I do not see an easy way out..Secondly. Is 4.5 years of dating enough time to expect a real commitment (engagement)? He's 26 and I'm 24. I do not like the fact we live together and he seems to have no intention of marrying me. I've toyed with the idea and he says "I'm not the marrying type" Unfortunately, I have to believe this is true because his parents never officially got married but have lived together for over 20 years. I'm NOT okay with that.And finally I've tried to break up with him several times and have attempted to date other men in these 4 years, but I am always disappointed with how they compare to him and always end up going back to my bf. Is this at all sane? I feel like I can't breathe I get so frustrated in my situation.. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, nologo  +, writes (14 June 2007):
 There is too much judgement in your words.
Sounds like you already made the decision.
"I do not like the fact we live together and he seems to have no intention of marrying me" - Come on, do what you decided.
Probably you will dump him next as you have reasons to do so.
After that you will need to change your role model, because of "I am always disappointed with how they compare to him..."
A
female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (12 June 2007):
 There isn't a time limit for when you should or shouldnt get engaged. It's down to different people and different relationships, but if you feel that maybe time for the next step has come around then have a chat with your partner.
I'm pregnant with my first child and before I found out my partner had been very anti being a dad. He's 24 and probably has a fear of messing the child up plus believeing he's not grown up enough. When I found out we sat down and he was catually over the moon.
Ok that is a bit different from engagement and weddings, but a lot of people think we are haing a baby too quick. We've been together 3 years and both felt it was right, plus I dont believe in abortions. It's down to you and you're partner how your relationship moves.
If you have no idea how he feels about engagements and weddings, then drop it in to a casual conversation but don't grill him.
Good Luck!
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