A
female
age
30-35,
*implegirl
writes:Ok, my boyfriend and I are planning to have sex soon. The thing is I love him really I do. Knowing that we are both virgins and that he is taking it very seriously, well in the sense that he wants everything to go right. He planned everything to the tee. I am impressed, because the guys I know wouldn't go through all the fuss. I am nervous, he is even counting down the days too. I know it's gonna hurt but I know that he will be gentle with me. We are both gonna be new to this. What can I do to make his experience great! I mean like really blow his mind! help plz!
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female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (16 January 2009):
Having sex for the first time is a big deal, in fact having sex for the first time in any relationship (even if you are not a virgin) is a big deal too. So I hope you are sure you are making the right decision. It seems to me that you feel pretty sure and from what I've read, your bf seems to be a good person (although i dont really know much about him).
The biggest mistake I made when first having sex was expecting that my bf and I would be together for ever. Do you think this will happen with you and your bf? If so, I suggest that you put having sex on hold for a bit, because having this expectation is a really big and probaly unrealistic one and if you have sex with the hope of being together forever, you will be let down so badly.
Just something to think about.
And as far as making it the best experience ever, as someone else already said, first time sex is never really that 'great'. The best thing you can do is just communicate with each other during it and say what you like and dont like, what feels good, what hurts etc. That way you will both know what makes the other person feel good.
Hope this has helped
And yes remember to work out the type of contraception you are going to use.Thats very importnat.
A
female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (16 January 2009):
 Honey, I'm afraid that first time sex rarely ever goes according to plan!
When me and my ex had sex for the first time, we'd planned it all and everything, just like you. But I'm afraid it never really goes the way you want it to!
The most likely thing is that he won't last very long - ie. He'll cum very quickly. This is normal because when lads first start having sex, most of them experience premature ejaculation and last about 5 minutes in some cases!
Don't expect wonders this time round, sweet. I would suggest that you just take it slow and don't try anything too extreme. The likelihood is that your first time won't last very long because it may hurt when he pushes in and, like I said, he may cum quite early on.
Once you get more used to it, you can get more practise in and this, I think, is the only way that you will really "blow his mind" - you'll start learning what he likes/doesn't like so much. etc.
Please, please, please use protection. You don't wanna get pregnant during your first time, hun!
Best of luck and take care xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2009): Right first of all to the other 2 "agony aunts" she didn't ask for any of your negativity she'd like some advice on first time sex not aw he'll chuck you once he's got what he wants and 2nd simplegirl, yes sometimes it does hurt on your first time but you say you love him so all you have to do is relax and enjoy it and he'll love you for it if you know for sure you're ready then you'll be fine.
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A
female
reader, megan1111  +, writes (15 January 2009):
Sorry but I was to do it all over again, I'd wait until we got married. When you do make love, if it's special, he is going to want it more and more and more. Eventually, you're going to have some concerns the relationship is only built on sex and you'll start to withdraw, thus causing problems.
If you're married, you know he loves you for more sex and although you'll be sore, you'll can really relax and experience sex in a variety of ways more than once a day.
Think about it. In the meantime, make sure you use birth control.
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