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First date nerves...

Tagged as: Online dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 March 2012) 3 Answers - (Newest, 16 March 2012)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Hello,

I've been single for ages, i joined a dating website and have a date on Sunday.. we are meeting in the day in a coffee shop so theres no issues in that respect, but firstly i'm panicking what to wear, i cant afford anything new so am going to put some nice jeans on and a nice top, but what do i say? what if the look on his face says 'oh god'.. i went through a painful divorce and have no confidence, i cant imagine that someone would want me.. just some pointers please of what to say what to do.. or a nice quote i can repeat to myself before i get out of the car to help me keep my head high, am so worried that its will go horribly wrong.. i'm 36 hes 44 so there is a difference in age but hes lovely looking and by our profiles we like the same things? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated x

View related questions: confidence, divorce

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A female reader, katiekate United States +, writes (16 March 2012):

katiekate agony auntHaving a blind date or officially meeting someone for the first time that you have already started to get to know has got to be one of the most nerve-racking experiences a person can go through. I have been in your shoes, as far as meeting someone from an online dating site, and what helped me was just to go in with no expectations. Be fearless, be relaxed, be confident (even if you have to fake it). The number one rule, however, is to BE YOURSELF! 100% YOU! Don't feel you have to be a certain way, or say certain things. After all, you want someone to like you for you, not for who you pretend to be. I don't know if you drink, but maybe having a small glass of wine before you go will help calm your nerves. And it's possible that this man is just as nervous as you are. Maybe say to yourself, "It's just coffee! Stop freaking out!" haha, that would be the kind of thing that would help me get out of my own head, relax, and just focus on having a good time.

Good luck to you!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

i'm worthy of having a good time - i like that xx thankyou

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A female reader, Starlights United Kingdom +, writes (16 March 2012):

Starlights agony auntDont panic, remember if he wasnt attracted to you he would not have asked you on a date in the first place ;)

You also have things in common to talk about, so strike up conversation regarding those subjects if you feel like you have nothing to say; there is always something to say.

If that causes silence ask him questions about himself, his hobbies, his life.

When you panic take a deep breath & breathe out....

know that it doesnt matter what happens as long as you enjoy your time.

A mantra you can use is;

"I am worthy of having a good time!!!" ,

then breathe deep & dont panic!

it will be fine. Its understandable you have nerves but dont let it ruin your fun time!

As for outfit, sounds good; simple jeans and a nice top,hair should be pretty, and a little makeup... your good to go, lol

Have a lovely time... and goodluck!

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