A
male
age
36-40,
*naixer
writes:I want to know what love is.I have female friends and I basically want to marry the girl at the first couple time we talk. But then, I realize... I was not falling in love with any of them. I was just being a male that want to have sex. I realize this because I hold myself back and keep most of my female friends as just "friends" for more than a month. And I found out that the feeling was gone before we even have our first kiss. So I never have a GF before, cuz I know that's not love. It just male impulses.And so far, I still don't get what love is.Should I just take one of my female friend and make her a GF? So that I know what love is like?But then I don't want to hurt my friends either.How does one develope love? (in Woman's perspective)Cuz I know for men, we just saw a good looking woman and we already consider her to be a partner. (regardless of personality)I know it's shallow, but that's all I experienced.PS. Don't mean to be rude, but most Guys are just BS about love. So I want to hear from the girl now. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, littlewoman  +, writes (16 January 2011):
 Knaixer:
When you fall in Love you feel as if your souls are connected, you feel good and alive in ways you have never felt before. You know that that person is the only one you will kiss for the rest of your life, you would do anything for that person to please her/him. When your in love you feel warm and tingly all over there is butterflies in your stomach, you are so happy that you want to laugh and cry all at the same time. You want to sing and let the world know that you love this person and your heart is so full of love it feel as if it will burst with it.
That is how I felt when I fell in love with my husband and I still feel like that. But love is a very poweful emotion and it can hurt you so bad you want to die. So make sure that when you do fall in love that she is in love with you too. Trus me on this because I am talking from experience, when I was with my ex I was in love with him, but he didn't reciprocate my love and my heart paid the price. But then I met my wonderful husband, he was everything that my ex was not. But it is better to have love and lost than to have never loved at all. If you do get hurt and almost every body does, don't give up because there is some one out there for you, you might have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find her though. But sometimes it is fun to kiss the frogs.
A
female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (15 January 2011):
 To love a person, first and foremost you must KNOW them personally. Lots of teenagers say they "love" a celebrity or are "in love" with them but of course this can't be, they love the idea of who they are but if they've never met them then it's just a crush or infatuation.
Real love on the other hand is very different. If you truly love someone then you respect them for who they are, warts and all. You want to look after them and protect them, you look out for them and put them first. You feel happy and content in their company and enjoy being together. Above all you can be yourself when you're with them. You never try to be anything more or someone different because you don't need to. You don't have to impress them to win them over and you never have to play games to make them like you. There is trust and understanding on both sides and you feel safe and secure within yourself. You would never undermine them, they are not someone in whose company you feel threatened or small. They are someone with whom you can share your innermost thoughts and worries, a person with whom you should be able to share anything, they are your friend and your confidante and you can be honest with them at all times, you can tell them anything because they love you as you are.
He/she may be someone who is the direct opposite of you. On the surface you may seem like chalk and cheese. Whilst you may be loud and forceful they may be quiet and thoughtful. You may come from different backgrounds, different countries or be twenty years apart but this doesn't matter. There is an unspoken language between you, the spiritual connection between you both is so deep that you seem to be able to communicate without even speaking to each other. You are happy to lie in silence together. You feel sometimes that there is no need to talk because you feel that you know what they are thinking anyway. You feel so close to them that sometimes you think you could almost read their mind. You know when they are worried, in pain, or sad just by looking at them. It is as though there exists some kind of telepathy between you.
Real love stands the test of time, you laugh together, cry together and even have your differences but this doesn't matter, you love that person AND their failings. You come together in a crisis and work through things together and this just brings you closer. You take their feelings into consideration in all that you do. They are the most important person in your life!
~Eve~
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (15 January 2011):
 No i dont recommend just dating one of your friends for the sake of it, she may end up getting hurt and you wouldnt be true to yourself. I guess a guy is attracted to a girl by her looks thats a knowing fact and off course you need to be attracted to someone to want to be in a relationship with them.
You know what i think the question 'what is love' is probably one of the hardest questions ever and many people just dont know the right answer to it. But i guess you need to have a spark with someone to want to be with them. Its when you meet someone and get to know them and you love spending time with them. When you are away from them all you want to do is be with them and you are happy with them and you can see yourself spending the rest of your life with them happily. Its when you want to know about there day and what they got up to and not just wanting to have sex with them but also be affectionate by kissing and hugging them. Its when you want to protect them and never let anything bad happen to them or you never want to see them hurt and when you are there to help them out and just be there for them. Hope this helps a little bit.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2011): You'll know when you find the right one. It's good that you're not rushing into things, and that you're not going to mess with any of their heads by asking them out, but not REALLY wanting to be with them. Just be patient, it will happen when you least expect it. Don't rush.
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