A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:"Dear Cupid", I just got a girlfriend about 2 weeks ago. We get along really well and we love being around each other because we can almost predict what the other one is thnkng, which I think is a massive improvement on how we acted around each oter the first few days, but she is still somewhat shy around me when we're alone. When she is upset, she tells both her twin sister and her best friend but she rarely explains to me what is going on. Since Saturday she has been telling people about how her old boyfriend, who currently lives in Florida, has been calling her, facebooking her, and texting her. She won't tell me anything he is saying, but her sister and friend have explained it somewhat. I feel like she either doesn't trust me or what he has been harassing and possibly even blackmailing her about. The only way I would even think about dumping her would be if she cheated on me. And she knows that I would do anything to make her feel better, but she won't tell me what's going on. Plus, friday, she is leaving for Florida on a fishing trip near where her ex lives, and I'm afraid he might get in her head an possibly make her depressed. Is there anything I can do to make her feel better and clear her head without her having to explain it to me? Is there a way to get her to trust me with this information so that I can better comprehend what she is going through and make her happier?
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male
reader, playitagain-sam +, writes (29 May 2013):
I think it's normal that she wouldn't want to share that type of problem with her new boyfriend so soon into the relationship. Maybe she doesn't want you to be jealous and start acting weird. She doesn't know how you'd react at all.
I don't think there is anything you can really do except be there to listen if/when she wants to talk about it. Let her know she can count on you to be her rock, but give her the space she needs to deal with her past.
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