A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My friend just got engaged after being with her bf for 2 year. I have been with mine for 2 and I know it'll be at LEAST another 3 before my bf ever even considers it [due to training for his job]. I feel a bit saddened. I know I shouldnt compare myself and every relationship is different etc, but I want a bf who shows he wants me with such a great gesture.
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female
reader, kirra07 +, writes (31 December 2010):
When I think of other relationships that are going well or things other guys do that are amazing for their girlfriends, I get a bit sad or jealous too, but then I try to think of the special things my boyfriend does for me. Did your boyfriend do anything special for anniversaries? Did he drive down a long way just to see you? Take care of you when you're sick? Send you nice messages? Think of something extra special that he did for you, and that might cheer you up.
Also, at your age, getting engaged after 2 years is even a bit early. I've seen many people get engaged, but then end up breaking up. And it's even more heart wrenching then. Also, getting engaged is an added strain on the relationship, especially when it's too early. People often change after getting engaged or married. After the initial rush of happiness, it settles back into a normal routine and couples often lose some excitement because it's like they're already done.
A
female
reader, sammi star  +, writes (31 December 2010):
 One grand gesture doesn't make a great relationship. Does he show you that he loves you with his actions and words? Having a boyfriend who's willing to get down on one knee wouldn't be much good if he wasn't a kind, loving and reliable man in the first place would it!
Research shows that 5 years is the typical amount of time it takes for the initial excitment and novelty of a relationship to wear off so if you're still going strong in another three years you'll know you've done the right thing in waiting.
It's natural to get dissapointed when you see your friends relationships moving forward but just be patient and thankful for what you have now. While you're wishing you had what your engaged friends have your single friends are probably thinking the same about you!
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A
female
reader, pancakes rule  +, writes (31 December 2010):
 Can I just ask, have you talked to him about the future much? Would he like to marry you someday? Why does his job training stop him considering engagement? I'd like to give you some helpful advice, but can you tell me a bit more first?
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