A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am dating a guy since 3months.he is damn good and sweet but he is always outdoor with his friends and busy.If I ask him when we would meet again he pushes it to the next week.I am feeling left out and miserable.He's my first love and I found him after searching for my guy in a dating site for nearly 2 years.I hav lost patience to search for another bf again.I would prefer to be alone if we breakup....If I explain my state he feels that I am too attached to him.Here in India Its hard to budge family pressure and he says he would get married when his parents find him a nice girl.He's perfectly fine with it as he's a bisexual.I donno how to handle this situation.any suggestions?Btw I prefer being indoor studyimg,working for my senior project,writing stories or poems and talk to people around. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Blue_Angel0316  +, writes (7 January 2009):
 Hon you are young and can easily move on. Don't WASTE your time trying to mold a man into what you want him to be. Chances are you WILL NEVER change him. This is part of his personality. Sometimes people change with time as they mature and grow into the person they were meant to become.
Usually a guy won't be bothered a bit by your trying to make him feel guilty or those tears you may cry. Sometimes it even makes them angry and more intent to do their own thing. (some women are like this too)They enjoy hanging out with the guys far better than with you,they often leave you sitting behind yearning for their attention. Making you wonder what you did to deserve all of this negative emotion you are feeling because he isn't there with you.
In your case the man being bi could have different reasons for his always being with the guys. It could be just a GUY THING or he may like one of the guys. It's hard to know since you aren't really around them at that point. You already know that he is waiting for marriage until HIS PARENTS FIND him a nice girl. If you ask yourself what are the chances of YOU being the NICE GIRL THEY PICK and if those chances are slim then you must realize that holding on or just waiting for him is WASTEING YOUR TIME.
The fact that he is nice and all is grand but you should let him go as boyfriend material and move on to FIND someone who WILL BE all that you need in a mate. You can always remain friends and in the end a hope that both of you will have found happiness. Don't let another minute of your life go by that you don't notice you are worth ALL that a man has to give in romance and love. Allow your man to have friends but find a man who knows that he should never let his friends come before or take the place of you in his life. You don't have to rush to find someone else, but I urge you to let him go as soon as possible so you have a much better chance at finding someone who wants you the same as you do them. Someone who will be a better suited partner for you.
*Just a note....if your family does the arranged marriage thing and you intend to follow what they say ,it's best to work with them in finding your mate so it can keep the troubles and stress down on both sides.
MY best to you and I hope you find the one you are looking for. Don't GIVE UP and NEVER STOP looking for what you want.
Seek GOD'S FAVOR and HIS WILL BE DONE.
When this door CLOSES HE WILL OPEN a NEW ONE!
God Bless,
Blue_Angel
^(**)^
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