A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm engaged and in college, it's somewhat of a long distance relationship though. I moved away for university, and he's doing the same. I was very scared about the distance, I know they hardly ever work out. Well lately I've been feeling very disconnected from him, and suddenly I'm wanting the freedom of being single in college. I didn't feel this way before I moved, I've always been very loyal and faithful, and I've always wanted committed relationships. I've only had 2 other boyfriends, and they were both 2-3 years long. The longest I've been single is 2 weeks, since I was 16. I don't know what to do, I don't wanna give up such a good guy, and I'm not going to cheat on him. Do I just give up my college years? What should I do? :(
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2013): OP* I guess it has to do with his behavior. We're just not progressing our relationship, and I'm starting to hold resentment. He's an amazing person, and I don't think I'll find someone more compatible personality wise, but financially, he's just not there yet, and I don't want to wait forever. I guess I want to be single and enjoy college without losing him. 'Have the cake and eat it too.' I know it doesn't work like that though...
I don't know if I can do it. :(
Thank you for your advice
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 April 2013):
well I think that you need to talk to him about how you feel and ask him what he would like you to do.
You are feeling disconnected from him. is this due to his behavior or your personal feelings?
You want the freedom of being single in college... well that means that you MUST tell him that you think that a breaking of the engagement is in order.
Part of the joy of college is the exploring of your options and the growth that comes from being able to experience now things.
YOU should NOT give up college just because you do not want to lose a good guy.
You say you have only been single for two weeks since you were 16. You need to be single for a bit to figure out what you really want. I know this is not what you want to hear but it's what's best. To be honest, what's probably going to happen if you don't end it now calmly and rationally is that you will end up doing it under emotional duress after you meet someone else that catches your eye.
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