A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I am only 14, but I just got out of a "thing/relationship" that lasted nine months (that's a long time for a middle school relationship) on and off, and was very complicated. We got involved back in the summer (2007), and during the summer break, I found out from my parents that I was transferring schools and moving that summer, to finish out middle school. We were both devastated, and this of course prevented us from becoming "official" or whatever. I really missed him all the time and he was always on my mind, and we decided that it was best to just not go anywhere. I got grounded for a couple months and couldn't see him for a long time. When I was off probation though, we saw each other and basically realized we couldn't be without each other because we were both miserable. So after being with him on New Year's Eve, he asked me to be his girlfriend, and I accepted, and then it just went downhill. He broke up with me after one fight, and then we got back together less then a week later. We had a lot of time together and we made the best of what we had. I had completely fallen head over heals, and I was/am still in love, I don't care how many people say teen's can't fall in love. Anyways, I found out that he was basically playin' me the whole time, and I was completely heartbroken. And so the only thing I felt I could do was end things with him. I then thought I made a huge mistake, but it was too late. We talk rarely, and it's been over 2 months. I am still completely broken. I spend most of my nights sleepless, crying, and staring at blank walls. My days at school are a living he**, and it physically hurts everytime I think about him or talk about him or even say his name. I miss him more than I can really handle. I'm not the same person, and I can't trust a single soul anymore. I have been screwed over to no extent, and I am so devastated. But I feel like he is completely over me, and that I am wasting my time on a guy that didn't care in the first place. How can I heal without any more hurt? Please, if anyone has anything that will help, do reply, I need some guidance.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2008): Remember in any relationship, it's about how you feel about them. But it's also how they treat you. It's one thing to ignore your BF/GF if you've got other stuff going on. But to be deliberately mean? THAT'S the deal breaker. You gotta ask, "Is this the way someone who loves and cares about me should act?", and would you ever act like that?
Focus more on how you feel when you are WITH him than when you're not. If he is the one, you'll eventually get all the time with him you want. When you're with him, you should be thinking "I'd rather be here, right now, than doing anything else". Again, if the answer is no...well you know the answer......
A
female
reader, Jendorset  +, writes (14 March 2008):
When your 14 every emotion seems deeper, i remember it like it was yesterday lol. Beleive me, we have all been through it. Times a great a healer, without even noticeing you will think about him less and less and you will feel fine again. Message me any time you need to x
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A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (14 March 2008):
 I think what you had was an obsession, but who knows? It might've been true love. You probably just regret the decision you made because you miss him, but I think that you made the RIGHT decision. It all boils down to maturity. You were simply way more mature than he was. I'm sure that some day you will find someone who is just as mature as you are about relationships. Don't let anyone tell you that this grieving is abnormal/has been too long. Everyone takes their own time getting over relationships. You have my condolensces.If you ever need a friend to talk to, just message me.
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