A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi there,I deleted my ex-boyfriend from facebook about a month after he broke up with me. Before that we were friends on msn and FB, but we weren't talking unless I initiated communication (only twice).1 week after I deleted him from Facebook and msn, he texted me both on FB and on my phone, asking me "what's up, why did you delete me from facebook? Did I do something?"I miss him and I want him back. I don't know how to reply to his message or if I should reply at all? He also sent a friends request to which I already clicked "ignore".Since he noticed that he has been deleted, I wonder if he still cares about me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi guys, so I replied to his message saying that I deleted him for my own reasons and that he didn't do anything wrong. He replied back to me saying: "Hey,
well it's not like i don't want to know u anymore... but if that is how u feel i respect that! I just enjoyed talking to u from time to time..."
If all he wants is friendship...well that really sucks and I won't be able to do it. Not to mention that in my experience ex-bfs usually make the most useless friends ever. I don't know what to do...
I am thinking to tell him that if he wants to keep in touch with me, he should be able to find other (than facebook) ways to contact me...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for the great answers. We didn't date very long - only 3 months and he broke up me saying that "we're too different from each other and he doesn't see future for us." He doesn't have another gf yet, but he is constantly out partying with his buddies, which is evident from his FB status -("last night rocked, but my head hurts..etc").
I haven't done anything wrong to my knowledge to cause the break up, but I suppose I got intimate with him too early (about 2 months into the relationship) and maybe he wasn't in love. He is 2 years younger and I am an exchange student in this European country in which he lives. I will be here for 2 years though, so I thought that this is plenty of time to have a relationship. He was very into me at the beginning and told all his friends about me, changed his relationship status to 'in a relationship with me', took me to formal parties organized by his fraternity as his date!
When he broke up with me he seemed very certain that this is what he wants. After a month of not hearing from him, I decided to delete him from FB. Now, I hear from him for a first time and wonder if he just wants to be friends (with which I am no longer comfortable with) or does he miss me and are there any chances for us?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): I hate to say this, but from your initial post and the post below.... it sounds as if he's just upset he lost a facebook friend. If he cared for you, or was interested in getting back together he would initiate the conversations. This guy sounds like an absolute douche bag. Stay far, far away from him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for the great answers. We didn't date very long - only 3 months and he broke up me saying that "we're too different from each other and he doesn't see future for us." He doesn't have another gf yet, but he is constantly out partying with his buddies, which is evident from his FB status -("last night rocked, but my head hurts..etc").
I haven't done anything wrong to my knowledge to cause the break up, but I suppose I got intimate with him too early (about 2 months into the relationship) and maybe he wasn't in love. He is 2 years younger and I am an exchange student in this European country in which he lives. I will be here for 2 years though, so I thought that this is plenty of time to have a relationship. He was very into me at the beginning and told all his friends about me, changed his relationship status to 'in a relationship with me', took me to formal parties organized by his fraternity as his date!
When he broke up with me he seemed very certain that this is what he wants. After a month of not hearing from him, I decided to delete him from FB. Now, I hear from him for a first time and wonder if he just wants to be friends (with which I am no longer comfortable with) or does he miss me and are there any chances for us?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): Why did he break up with you? Was it for another woman? If so, then I wouldn't give two rats butts what he thought about me deleting him as a friend from Facebook or any other networking outlet. Maybe you deleted him because, it's your way of trying to cope with the fact that he left you--maybe you are trying to get over him thus you don't want to be tempted to look at his FB page for fear that you might see photos of other women, or his status might say "In A Relationship." If he was a good guy and he just broke up with you simply because, he wasn't ready for a relationship, then I might add him as a friend later on, that is if you were in love with him and you are trying to cope with it, I would be honest with him in that case.
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A
female
reader, cnith  +, writes (2 May 2010):
 I'd keep it simple and truthful.
"We're not in a relationship. We're not even friends anymore because you don't talk to me. So I was 'cleaning house' and deleted people I don't talk to anymore."
See what he says to that. As for wanting him back? Why? so he can delete you again? makes no sense...
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): Damn, you sound like you're playing the game right!!! If he broke up with you, Id delete him, as long as he still has ur number. Hes either gonna brush the dirt off his shoulders and keep moving on, or he will realize that he wants you back, and then damit you make him want you back. Keep doing than, if you never hear back from him then it wasnt worth it3
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): he probably still cares . he may still have feelings for you & want a second chance .
perhaps start a conversation w / him ? tell him ( because u deleted him ) that you thought he didn't mind you , so why would you still have him friended ? therefore he can reply sayin no , it's not that I don't mind , I still care . ( maybe )
you never know , just try it out ! (;
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A
female
reader, rambini  +, writes (1 May 2010):
 It may be that he still cares, but whether he cares just as a friend or as more is unclear. when you have been with someone for a while, you are obviously still goign to care about them after you break up, feelings dont just disappear overnight.
The best way to respond could be just to say something like "you havent done anything wrong, but we havent really spoken since we broke up so i figured maybe we could both use some space - sorry if it came across badly"
you get the gist, good luck! x
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