A
male
age
51-59,
*mnesiac_Radar
writes: I have an update to a previous situation with my now ex girlfriend. I'm seeing a new girl, she's more my own age and really nice, we're getting on well and I'm optimistic. There's none of the games that my ex played but I put that down to the age difference (my ex is 16 years younger than me). Anyway, I haven't contacted my ex for 3 months now and I also deleted her number from my phone but I've just received a text from her, just making small talk-as if we'd never split up. What's that all about? Even stranger is that her name came up as being the sender yet she's no longer in my contacts, grrr... Sony Ericsson phone! I texted her back-just being polite and told her I'd deleted her number. I have no intention of establishing a friendship with her as I don't want to jeopordise what I now have. What are her intentions? Or am I reading too much into this?
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male
reader, Amnesiac_Radar +, writes (28 April 2010):
Amnesiac_Radar is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all your comments, much appreciated. Ex texted me and asked what was happening with me so I texted that i was seeing someone and it was going well. It seems my ex was just fishing for info as she asked me about other areas of my life. Back in Feb I told her I didn't want her to contact me any more and I'm chuffed I resisted but it seems she just can't respect my wishes.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2010): Have you ever thought she may just want to attempt to finnish everything on good terms? Thats what I try to do with all of my exes. Unless you find that she is really trying to learn about your relationship with you new gf or is asking too many personal questions or asks you anything sexual; I would suspect her intentions are just to attempt to be able to be friends and leave things on a good note. She could see you as a confident, especially since she's so much younger than you. Young people(esp girls) seem to need people to confide in more so than someone older. (even moreso if their fathers out of the picture.)I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl +, writes (26 April 2010):
Hun, she was probably just wanting to see if you were still available.....
I think by admitting to her that you had deleted her number from your mobile should tell her that you have moved on with your life..
If she persists, then tell her that you have a new lady in your life, am blissfully happy - that should give her the hint!
Honeygirl
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (26 April 2010):
It was possible that she was testing the waters to see if you could reconnect ,but you told her you have deleted her number, so hopefully she'll get the hint and will leave you alone. If she does not, just tell her politely the truth : that you are not interested in establishing a friendship with her because your needs for female companionship are already being fulfilled.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (26 April 2010):
Yeah, she's missing you. You're doing the right thing by cutting her off. Sometimes, the old denial thing sets in by ex'es when the dust settles on a breakup. The "he was just mad" thing. And, unfortunately, this is one reason why the "let's just be friends" approach to breaking up does not work.
I wouldn't have any further contact with her if she texts you again. Not even just to be polite. If she doesn't get the hint with you ignoring her, a very unpolite, direct email saying "Do not contact me again" may have to be in order.
Good luck with your new relationship.
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