A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Me and my ex are having a row about money and maintainence payments four our 4 month old son. Basically, we split when I was pregnant but he told me he would help me raise our child and pay his way. We agreed to go splits on baby stuff and he would pay me £250 per month maintainence when the baby was born. Anyway, our son was born and my ex began to make regular payments every month. But my son is in need of a cot (hes currently in crib) and cot stuff i.e. bedding and mobile and mattress etc which in total costs about £300. Ive asked my ex to go splits with me like we previously agreed but he said no because he is now giving me maintainence money and it should come out of that. He has a full time job and I know he earns quite a bit. He also lives at home with his parents (even tho hes in his 30s)! Im on maternity leave and struggling on half pay and benefits. There are other things my son needs for the nursery i.e. changing unit and drawers but my ex said he does not need to pay me any more money. I think this is wrong as maintainence money goes towards stuff like baby food nappies clothes and just general upkeep doesnt it? I would appreciate all views on this as me and my ex are having major rows about it! He also keeps telling me hes skint as he has no car at the moment and his parents both have no money so hes helping them with their bills and mortgage. This makes me even more mad because our son should be his top priority and i dont see why he has to go without because of his parents.
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female
reader, Waiting for an angel  +, writes (15 July 2010):
Well i jst had my baby 2wks ago and i think the crib, matress, changing table etc etc is an unnecessary expense you shouldn 't waste money on those things that you wont need cuz you can always change ur baby on your bed or couch. Also maternity leave is usually 6 wks & your son is already 4mths, if hes helping you then thats good you can always file child support we're in the same situation but i try to only use the money he gives me on NECESSARY things an a crib & changing table are a luxury not a necessity....
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