A
male
age
41-50,
*enstar
writes:Hi Guys, I split up with my girlfriend of a few years abit back and had some time on my own.. I decided a couple of weeks ago to try meeting someone else, so I went on a dating site and messaged a girl, she messaged me back and we exchanged mobile numbers. Since then we've been bouncing texts back and fourth, as I'm a pretty up front kind of guy, I asked her straight what she was looking for and she said that she doesn't want to be on her own, she wants someone to share her life with, and ultimately wants children- pretty much the same position as me! Anyway, we spoke on the phone for the first time last week. It was all going well and we arranged a date for last night. Anyway, the date went well, we seemed to really get on well, both taking an interest in eachother, laughing, same interests etc.. Then when I drove her home, I asked if she wants to see eachother again and she said yes and how well she thought it went, we had a brief kiss and it was nice.My issue is, when we first started texting and for the first week, I'd wake up to a 'good morning' text, sometimes she would message first and sometimes I would but generally they bounced all day throughout each day, she'd say 'good night' before she went to bed and all that, but since the last 5 days, I wont hear off her unless I message her first, and her messages are pretty brief like she's just replying to me cause I've messaged her and its like a delay even though sometimes it says 'message read', I don't understand why this is..I only have this issue because its not been consistent. As I said, I'm an upfront kind of guy and would like to just know really, (I'm not into games or messing around) can you recommend what I should do/ if I should just ask??Thanks guys
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split up, text, want children Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (18 February 2015):
 I like daisies for a first bouquet.
and yes if you know where she works send them there if you can
and don't text her to have a relationship.. pick up the phone and call her...
A
female
reader, Runaway Girl +, writes (17 February 2015):
Do know where she works? if send them there with a card saying something like, looking forward to our next date. or thinking of you.
Most women like flowers, go for it.
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A
male
reader, benstar +, writes (17 February 2015):
benstar is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWhat like?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2015): I took her out last night.. Thanks for the advice guys! One more thing, when I take her out on the second date, I was thinking of getting her some flowers, do you think that's a good idea?
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A
female
reader, Runaway Girl +, writes (16 February 2015):
I agree ask her out, its been five days and maybe she is a little miffed that you haven't already made a firm date I would have been.
She is probably thinking I am good enough to text but not to be taken out.
Anyone can text morning and night but action speak louder than words.
Good luck x
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (16 February 2015):
 I would ask her out sometime again. If she meant yes then she would like to go out. Otherwise she might be saying yes just to avoid an awkward moment. I think playing hard to get is only suitable when one came on too strong at first and didn't want to seem desperate. Neither of you are so there really is no point. Also people play hard to get when the target seems too cool and moves slow. So that doesn't pertain to you. As for expressing life goals, what she described: someone to share life with, blah blah is a default answer. It doesn't mean that person would be you, or that she's really ready for it. You also have to realize a large percentage of people online just got off a relationship to mend a broken heart by dating a new person. So if she is still in love with an ex then no one could win the place to her heart.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2015): If you're an upfront sort of guy than date her. Stop reading her intentions and feelings according to the frequency of her text messages. Are you dating her or her phone?
If you want to know how "she" feels; ask her out and get face-time. "Talk" to her in-person. Ask her if she wants to get together more often. That leaves her an opening to tell you to your face what's going on. Personally, when people slack-off making contact; I simply move on and go about my life. That lets them know, I've got other important interests to occupy my time. I keep my options open. Playing hard to get is senseless and old-fashioned. Playing games is for children. Then again; in her defense, you have to be patient. Don't be pushy or demanding.
If you hear very little from her, just assume her interest is wearing-off.
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