A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So, I'm a freshman in college and there is this guy that I met who lives down the hall from me. I spend a lot of time in his and his roommate's room and they are both juniors. Every time I hang out in there, I start to like him a little more than I did before. We flirt a lot and sometimes I feel like he has feelings for me too. The only problem is... he has a girlfriend of 3 years. I'm not very experienced in relationships and guys, so I'm not exactly sure how to handle this situation. I really don't want to come between him and his girlfriend, but I really like him. What should I do?? Does he actually seem to have feelings for me too, or am I just thinking he does because I like him?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): If you like him more everytime you see him and he has a gf then don't see him. It's the best thing for you or you will just end up hurt
A
female
reader, FloridaCatGirl +, writes (21 November 2010):
 From what little you have told us, it's really hard to say whether he has any feelings for you or not. Sometimes when you like someone, you will overanalyze and misinterpret things he does and says because you are secretly hoping he feels the same way. You mentioned that he flirts with you a lot, so he may be interested in you. Does he flirt with other girls, or just you? Some people are just very friendly and like joking around in a flirty way. Maybe if you give us some examples of things he has said or done when flirting… we can give you better advice.
We can’t forget that he has a girlfriend who he has been with for 3 years. Has he made any comments that lead you to believe they are going to break up soon? If so, wait until he has broken up with her before you let him know you like him. You don’t want to be the one to break them up. If you did… you would probably end up being a “rebound” girlfriend that he would move on from… and I don’t think that is what you would want.
Let us know what happens! Good luck!
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A
female
reader, pollywolly101  +, writes (21 November 2010):
I've been in a similar situation myself and it's hard! You just have to keep reminding yourself that this guy has a girlfriend and you can't do anything to jeopardize his relationship. The best thing to do may be to put your feelings aside for now and focus on something else. Someone new will come along, who'll be single :)
He may be reciprocating the flirting because he simply finds it flattering and enjoys it. Most boys I know do. So yeah, have fun with it, but don't let it go too far. :) Hope that helps!
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): umm. leave it alone! he has a girlfriend. it's easy for us to justify wrong when we're the ones who like a person. you have to think, if he has a girl now and u say he flirts bak with you then what would stop him from doing the samething to you if you were his girlfriend??? you wouldnt know just like his girlfriend now probably doesnt knw he flirts with you.. i know how hard it is to feel for someone who may or may not feel for you too, i promise you i do but listen morals are important even if many people dnt think so anymore!!! you deserve someone for you and just you only!!!! if being around him is hard for you then dnt be around him unless you're forced to be because of a class or something. but the more you look into him you will push toward makn decisions that probably isnt your normal character.. we all have to do what we feel is right for ourselves but my advice to you would be leave it!! when he is available then maybe, til then its trouble..
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