A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,i need some advice on how to deal with my colleague.She is 7 months pregnant and all she goes on about all day at work is her baby!!! Its her 1st and i know she is excited but honestly from the moment she gets in work at 9am until 4.45pm when she goes home all she does is go on about what names she likes,what she ordered from mothercare,her hospital appointments,her cravings etc...Then she sits there and every 10 minutes she calls us (me and the rest of the office) over to feel the baby move or the baby kick.Sometimes when i get in work i dont even have time to take my coat off and she hounds me showing pictures of her scans!Honestly it bores me so much!! I think my other colleagues are getting bored aswell.I dont want to upset her and create an awkward working environment.I did casually mention this to our manager who has on the rare occasion told her in a nice way to get on with work and baby chat for breaks but she doesnt take any notice.Its has been going on for 7 months7 MONTHS!!!-from the moment she got pregnant-1st she went on how exited she was and how she cant believe it etc..Then we had to listen to her go on about the morning sickness-the best thing with that was she got signed off for 2 weeks! Then she came back and was telling us about her bladder problems and fatigue..its never ending!!HELP!!!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2009): I work in an office where there is the majority of women and when 1 of them gets pregnant they do tend to go on. Obviously they are really excited but it does get boring hearing about morning sickness and hospital appointments and scans.
Share it with your family and close friends who care-thats my opinion!
Try to avoid her when possible or pretend you have loads of work and deadlines to meet.Failing that develop selective hearing!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2009): Anonymous-you obviously didnt read the the post properly.
We do have lives-just ones that dont exist about CONSTANTLY talking about babies-8 hours a day 5 days a week!!!
Yes birth is a miracle and the woman has every right to be happy but its not the be all and end all!!! She isnt the 1st woman in history to have a baby nor will she be the last!!
When i was pregnant it was a joyous time for me but i was careful not to constantly talk about it at work or even in my close circle of friends to much-if people asked me then yes i would happily answer their questions but i didnt get a "mummy head" on and my life didnt nor does it now consist of just me and my baby. I love my little boy and would do anything for him but im still ME and i do have a life outside my wife and mum duties.
Congratulations for your daughter and future grandchild.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2009): Aw shucks she is having a baby and is happy. So is my daughter actually. What a miserable lot you are and as for the army wife, well three of mine were born in army hospitals (when they had them) and you just sound very jealous.
Good luck to the woman and the rest of you get a life!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2009): Hi All,
i am the origional poster of this question but forgot to take my code down!! Doh!!
Thanks for all the feedback!
Uncle Phil-no i dont have any children of my own and after putting up with 7 months of her going on i feel im pregnant!! Maybe steralisation is on the cards for me!!lol!
Emilyanswers-my collegue actually has a picture of her scan as her profile picture!! I like those 1 liners you said-i will have to try them out!!!
She said she will be taking 1 year maternity leave so that is something to look forward to! Unfortunatly she has already told us she will be bringing the baby in to work to show us and expects us to go and visit her at home!! Im already starting to think of excuses!!
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (31 January 2009):
GOD I GET THIS ALL THE TIME!!!
I live on an army base and I am the only woman who doesn't have a baby. This means I deserve pity / funny looks.
All the girls here have their ENTIRE LIVES revolving around their kids. 2 of them are currently pregnant and go ON AND ON and post millions of pictures of babies on facebook and go on about it.
I just let them know subtly that I have no interest in kids by saying things like "Oh, 6lb 8, and that's good is it?" and "wow, I'm just so jealous of the fact you are going to deal with runny poo at 3am." and my personal favourite "I heard they give you HERION to help with your labour pains - now that's got to be worth losing your social life and figure for."
The other thing is just to interrupt, and bring up things about your own life. About how you are going out and getting drunk, and planning holidays, and your dramatic love life.
She has baby brain. This turns all women into drivelling idiots and is one of the reasons I never want kids. Just treat her as a mentally ill person and make fun of her mad baby obession and she might chill out a bit.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2009): FIND ANOTHER JOB. This isn't going to stop. Once she does have the baby she'll be all over you with baby pictures and cute little stories about what the baby did, "and then she spat up on John's shirt! It was the cutest little thing you've ever seen!" "I think she's a really bright baby. I think I heard her say mama just this morning... And she's only a month and a half!" "She started pre-school. She's definitely head and shoulders above the rest of the kids". "She reads at the eighth grade level, I think she'll get into Harvard later"Yea, it's time for one of those career changes. Major bummer. Better luck next time.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2009): Yeah, a lot of new moms are like that and you probably aren't going to changer her....all you can do is change yourself and your reactions....the minute she starts to blab, get up, walk away and politely say, "I have a lot of work to do today, I am sorry but I just don't have time to talk to you about this...." Don't agree to look at any pictures either, just say "not now". We really do teach people how to treat us....she isn't going to stop her endless dribble, she has a one track baby mind and you can't stop her, but you don't have to be a party to it either.....get a backbone and tell her you don't have time and then mean it.
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A
female
reader, Rae1031  +, writes (31 January 2009):
This is a two way thing that you probably want to be careful with especially if she is your friend or if you liked working with her prior to her pregnancy. You don't want to say something right now that will hurt her feelings even if you know her and know that it is something that may not have of hurt her feelings prior to the pregnancy. When I was pregnant I cried over thinking everybody hated me because I cried too much! You don't want to have to start dealing with that. On the other hand she is taking an experiance that is suppose to be special and that people are suppose to be able to enjoy with her into an annoying nightmare and I doubt it will go away after she has the baby because then you will have to listen to the baby stories! Since newborns don't do much of anything on their own, I am sure many of these stories will involve doo-doo, pee-pee and spit-up. I don't know if this will work since she does not seem to take a hint very well, but why don't you get together with your co-workers that feel the same way as you and decide that from now on everytime that she starts talking excessivly about the pregnancy, you will change the subject. If she tries to gear it back to baby talk, change it again. Even if you are not talking about anything to begin with, when the baby talk has gone too far and is getting on your nerves - start talking about shoping, or weekend plans. It may not always be easy to think of things to talk about while somebody is talking excessivly in your ear and the only thing you can think is SHUT UP! I have a boss that makes me feel this way and he is not pregnant. Make a "topic" list and keep it with you so that you will be armed with things to say. She will eventually understand that while you are all happy for her, you are not pregnant and would like to talk about other things. Good Luck and whatever you do be gental.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2009): You've only got a couple more months of baby torture - after that you can relax, but I bet she won't be able to. I suspect the novelty will wear off once it's arrived and she's up all night with it screaming the house down.
Whatever you do, don't ask her anything about her pregnancy in the meantime!
I don't know if you've got any kids yourself but if not, you could tell her that you have a distaste for babies then she'll most likely go and bore someone else.
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