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anonymous
writes: Hi, I'm in a situation that it's hard for me to trust my boyfriend.I'm scared of being hurt or played again. I've been married twice and both times before I was 23 years old, the first being at age 18.Both of my husbands cheated on me and the last one fought me physically. I am not trying to go through the pain and torture any more but I love my boyfriend.I met him in my senior year in high school when I was engaged to my first husband. I should have gotten with him then. We graduated class of 1999 together and saw each other occassionally while just passing through. We finally met up again in April 2004 and got together then.He told me about his past and it developed questions in my mind so now I can't help thinking bad things of what he's doing behind my back. I don't want to destroy our relationship I want us to be happy together. He constantly tells me that he's in love with me, wants to marry me, have kids with me and he don't want no one else but I can't stop fearing of being hurt.I love him with every breath in my body and if I get hurt again I think I'll just die. PLEASE HELP ME!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A reader, T, writes (12 February 2005): You have been through the wars and taken a lot of scarring!Basically my philosophy is to dive in, why should someone suffer because of someone else's wrong doings? but....Your problem is that you throw too much in... 'I love him...and if I get hurt again i think I'll just die'. That is saving nothing for yourself!Take it easy girl! Slow down, 23 and two marriages behind you? There is no reason to jump into no. 3!! If he really loves you he can hang on a bit. Tell him you are happy being with him but you need to at least wait untill your dress is back from the cleaners!You have learnt the hard way that some folks words don't mean nothing! It ain't always the case and this guy could be the genuine article but you gotta takes a little time for your self here! My suggestion is to hang off from marriage for a while yet. If he truely loves you he won't try to change your mind, (he just needs to wait with you right?) especially if he knows there were two of them and one roughed you up! You need time your self girl!Hope it works out
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