A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:*OP's own title*I have been dating an awesome guy for 4 years. We are amazing for each other. i mean amazing but i've recently gone to college and he's in the military and that combination seems horrible. Everything was perfect but i decided to be the college kid and go out and party. one night i got really drunk, blackedout, woke up to my friend telling me what i had did. Cheat! i had to tell him. he forgave me but it was very hard. i decided maybe drinking is stupid and i shouldn't do it cause i don't want this to happen again. Next thing i know couple months later, drank again. got stupid. cheat! i did not know until a week later that i had cheated. that how much i did not know it happened. telling my man again was horrible. i for sure thought it was over. i thought to myself. if i love someone so much how can i do this. i should be in pain forever. cheating on someone you love once is enough but twice. Definatly alcohol was an issue. MOnths later, i drank again. I knew that drinking a lot is out of the hand so i have to stop doing that. But throughout the night i lost track and i was with a bunch of friends. I didn't think anything would happen. But it did. Now i could just run away. Leave forever. 3 times is insane. I don't understand how a human can do this. I haven't told him yet but i want to so bad. I know now it will be over and im being selfish but it is killing me. I can't sleep, eat, i wanna puke. I love him so much and it may sound like i don't but you don't know us. Were so good together and everything is great. Drinking is stupid i know. But it's hard being a college student and not partying. But if it's ruining my relationship with the one i love.. blah blah. i knoww that. Im so confused. I hate myself so much i couldn't possibly forgive myself. i'm hurting the one i love. what should i do??????? please any advice will doo.
View related questions:
drunk, military Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am done drinking. I know that is the reason for all this. It's just it feels like I have been torn on the inside. It feels like I found out he cheated on me. Because I have no recollection of this happening at all. Telling him feels like it will be the death of me. I don't understand how someone can love someone so much and then hurt them. I don't want to tell him because i do not want to hurt him again. It feels selfish. I was wondering if i should wait to tell him the next time i see him or on the phone now. I planned on visiting him in a month. I know the guilt is gonna kill though. Someone switch lives with me right now.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2010): Whether you realize it or not, it sounds to me like you're testing him to see how far he will accept this stuff from you. You seem to want to push him until the breaking point. If you really were trying not to lose him at the subconscious level then you wouldn't have risked a second time, much less a third.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2010): "it's hard being a college student and not partying."I'm a senior in college, and never did I once drink or party throughout my four years here. You drink, you cheat. Simply put, get help, and stop drinking. Enough with the blaming, and "its hard not to party in college." You're lucky you've got one hell of a man that has stood by you after three times; I know many men (including myself) that would have simply left you even after the first time, so give him some respect and stop drinking.
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (17 April 2010):
 This is a recipe for disaster.
Today , you may lose your b/f ,tomorrow you may lose other important things in your life or even your life .
You need to exert more self control and be more assertive .
You are traveling into a dead end road.
Turn back before it is too late.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2010): Well needless to say you KNOW you have to tell him. Anyways it seems you have a HUGE problem with alcohol, drinking and getting tipsy/ drunk is one thing, but drinking until you blackout/can't remember is QUITE another. My reccomendation to you is to avoid places where alcohol is a main attraction. Seek proffesional help for your alcoholism, AND attend AA and DADS meetings.
...............................
|
