A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Im 15 and im 10weeks pregnant, i do have a boyfriend who i have been with for about a year but in febuary we had a break and i got a bit drunk and slept with another boy. And i know for a fact the baby is his. i got back with my boyfriend about a week later then found out i was pregnant. everyone obviously thinks its my boyfriends baby but i know its not and i dont know what to do because obviously they are going to know when the baby dont look like my boyfriend.i really really dont want to tell him or anyone. What do i do? Please help.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2009): You better let him know now. The sooner you tell the better because it would be even worse if he went through everything and the babys born then you tell him. Give him time to take it all in. Maybe he will stick by you but since its not his kid and you guys are so young he might not.
A
female
reader, chazx +, writes (4 May 2009):
 Congratulations on the baby and good luck.
You should really tell him and if he chooses to stick around thats good but make sure your child knows the truth to if the real daddy wants in on his/hers life.
My step dad took over being my dad when i was 6 months old and i always called him dad/dy but i also have contact with my real father and in all honesty i choose my step dad over him anyday.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2009): tell him even though it will hurt him. He needs to know.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (3 May 2009):
Glad we could help.
I know this is going to be hard to think hard. Get everything straight in your head then take a deep breath and just get it all over with.
It will all be ok in the long run.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks all for your comments, they did help.
im going to think about it properly and sit down and really think x
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A
female
reader, jessica04  +, writes (3 May 2009):
 Listen to EmilyAnswers. Life is hard, but once you start owning up and taking responsibility for your actions, it gets a lot easier. It isn't always pleasant, but if you are going to be a mummy then you need to set a good example, and honesty is always the best policy.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (3 May 2009):
Oh sweetie. I know this was a mistake and you didn't mean for it to happen. I'm not going to lie to you, your life is going to be pretty miserable.
But you decided you were grown up enough to get drunk and you decided you were grown up enough to have sex with a stranger.
Now there are consequences and you have to grow up and take them.
You are probably going to lose your boyfriend and it is not going to be very nice for you at school or home or anything, but you'll just have to deal with it as an adult.
You just need to get your boyfriend and then tell him the truth. Explain what happened and why.
Then you need to tell your parents and friends.
Then you need to find the boy who is the dad and tell him and see if he wants to be involved, or just pay for the baby. Get a paternity test once the baby is sure so he has no doubts and you can go to the CSA with it if he refuses to pay. Would he be happy if you considered adoption?
You need to get your side of the story out there through your friends as people are going to hear a lot of rumours.
Luckily it will be the summer holidays soon so you only have to keep your head down and work hard for a few more weeks.
It will be horrible for you I know but unfortunately you have no choice about this.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, Yancy +, writes (3 May 2009):
Dear 15 & Pregnant,
I am so sorry you are going through such heavy issues at this time in your young life. First thing to remember is that a few bad decisions don't define who you are. You are a beautiful creation of God, and you are loved. Secondly, if your real boyfriend ever wants to be sure the baby is his, that answer is easy to come by these days with a paternity test, so hiding the truth could come back to haunt you later.
The bigger question now is, whether you are ready to be a mom. Go to a family councelling clinic and discuss the options with them. They can help you with your decision about your future. Finally, and you already know this by now, time to get your act together. You are far too valuable to throw away your potential for a fun-filled, exciting youth with the dangers of sex & drugs. You are better than that and you know it. If Mr. Boyfriend is the right guy for you, he'll understand and "step up" and stand beside you through the tough decisions to come. Whatever it was that drove the two of you apart in February was not all on you. He had to have had some culpability in the split as well. So if he wants to weeny around and play the blame game, then he's not the guy for you anyway. Drop him like a hot rock so you can move on. Good luck, hoping for the best for you.
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A
female
reader, Roxy1989  +, writes (3 May 2009):
 you are going to have to tell him otherwise youll have massive problems in the future .. its only fair to him ,the baby and yourself ,how can you live a lie for the rest of your life ,dont lie girl ... okay it will be painfull and he might leave you,but thats nothing compared to the pain you will have lying to yourself and everyone else for the rest of your life. Its your choice ,and just the fact that you seek help obviously shows that deep down inside you know its the right thing to do. Good luck with everything and i hope you make a wise decision
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A
male
reader, Tewebag +, writes (3 May 2009):
well if you slept around you need to tell him, and since your pregant you need to get a std/sti test since you werent using a condom. you had sex with should shouldnt make a man who it isnt his child care for it thinking it is his baby if he chooses to take care of it because he cares about you, thats his choice.
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A
female
reader, Seven_Deadlies +, writes (3 May 2009):
 You're 15? Where are your parents, dont they have something to say about this? And your boyfriend is okay with this?If you know for certain that the baby is not his then you better tell him sooner rather than later. But why you're pregnant at your age escapes me...
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