A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello :(My boyfriend keeps lying about silly little things and it's making me lose trust in him, I'll list some examples.He is very close to his ex(I have no problem with it) and I saw his emails to her last month where she was complaining about her current boyfriend and he put "should've stuck with me ;)" when I asked him about it, I didn't try to make an argument, I just asked. He said he said "I meant it to her like a friend, nothing more" and we didn't argue and I left it then, but then it got to me and I could tell he was lying so I confronted him again the next day and he just apologised and said he didnt know why he said it.Then he tells me he thinks this girl he has been speaking to recently is weird and he doesn't like her, I knew something was up when he said it because he a sort of guilty look on his face, so I read an email between them where he was telling me he thinks her nipple piercings are sexy and was trying to make conversation with her the same day he told me he thought she was a weirdo :/He's flirted with girls in the past and I've always been angry(lately, I'm losing trust and care for him though) and he blocked one of them that I found him heavily flirting with.Then I ask him if he dated one of my friends a while back, just to see if it was the same girl. There was nothing in accusive in the question, I was just asking, as a sort of general question and he said "Yes, I didn't sleep with her though" and I found out he has.My last example(there are plently more, but I'd be typing forever and I'm sure boring you by now) is really silly, but more lies, a while ago he wound me up saying he thought Megan Fox was sexy, at first I was joking with him, then he began to wind me up more and more and it got to breaking point and I told him to stop it during an argument and he said "It was a joke, she's a munter anyway. You're the prettiest girl" then the next day he was joking around with his friend about her and went "ooft" and like, pretended to air grope boobs(stupid I know) so I decided to get him back and was pretending to enjoy looking at pictures of celebrity male and he kicked me and took away the laptop all night... So he must find these things serious to do that? :(Why does he lie to me like this?I've told him I don't care about what he's done in the past and reassured him plently of times, yet he still chooses to lie to me.On the other hand he's very protective over who I speak to and doesn't even like me putting 'x's to other males.We've been together 2 years with a child and I see no reason for all this hurt he's causing me, if he doesn't want me. Why can't he just tell me :(All advice is appreciated, I'm just confused. Maybe some of you guys will know why he does this?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2011): I'm the orginal poster. Unfortunately with more bad news...Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, we had an argument about this when I "called him out" and he was laughing at me crying and making fun of me to one of his female friends, he also turned the whole argument around on me and told me he couldn't trust me because I found this stuff outI'm not a fan of snooping but after all this I wanted to know what he said about me online and I found out he told a girl he barely knows he had "slight regret, but thats hush stuff" about our baby, yet he has never mentioned this to his close friends...I've also let him go on a road trip last wednesday until this monday morning with his friends, he has time to update his facebook status about what he's up to, but apparently not enough time to reply to a little message I sent him...Life is cruel
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (20 September 2011):
 Let's put some light on a few of your phrases....
1. "Maybe some of you guys will know why he does this?
He does it because YOU LET HIM GET AWAY WITH IT!!!!!
2. "I see no reason for all this hurt he's causing me..."
Neither does he, because he is oblivious to your needs.
3. "Why does he lie to me like this?
Because you haven't yet "called" him on it!!!!
There's an old, tired cliche that sez that people will only mistreat you as much as you let them do so...
Armed with that.... you must decide when you've had enough mistreatment, and stand up for yourself.
P.S. It may mean that you have to walk away from this inconsiderate, lying dog.....
...............................
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