A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've never had one my entire life. I've always been very ambitious and hard-working, and I have high standards regarding guys, but the type of guys I fall for always seem to have girlfriends or just aren't interested in me. They're also really rare (I go for personality and not just looks, and I want someone who's a nice, kind, decent person).How do I stop this getting me down? And should I put more effort into putting my self out there (even asking guys out if necessary) or be patient and bide my time? Also are relationships at my age (Im nearly 20) usually a a bad idea/waste of time?
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female
reader, R1 +, writes (19 April 2013):
 Just get out there and meet new people, they may only be come friends but one day you will meet the right one.
Your first boyfriend is unlikely to be your last but it is important as you need to date different people to find yourself and work out what you want in a relationship. It's a learning experience.
A
female
reader, HeresBoo  +, writes (19 April 2013):
 You'll find those guys are actually everywhere you look, it just depends whether you see they're kindness straight away. You can still have high standards, but that doesn't mean closing people off either. If you want those standards met, you have to give everyone a chance to meet them.
And I know it's hard, but it's also hard being in a relationship. There's a lot of complications when you share your feelings and body with someone and things can get difficult.
Focus on you, have fun waiting for a guy you like, not trying to find one, and enjoy being single while you're young! Go snorkelling with a friend! G to the zoo haha just enjoy :)
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A
male
reader, hammad.ali07  +, writes (18 April 2013):
There's nothing wrong with not having a boyfriend. I'll answer in a simple way that its not a bad thing to have your standards but its very important to understand what are your standards.Relax,right guy will appear when you least expect it.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (18 April 2013):
I think the first thing to realize is that there's nothing wrong with not having a boyfriend. People seem to have this thing about relationships nowadays. I found my girlfriend when I wasn't actively looking, and I think that happens quite a lot.
The problem with worrying about this, or aiming specifically for a boyfriend, is that guys might see that you're down about it and be put off, or they might feel that you're a little desperate for a boyfriend, which will scare them a bit.
I think you'd be better still biding your time, and not worrying about it. The right guy will come along, and don't be afraid to ask him out of you think you've met him. Also, whilst it's very good that you have your standards, do make sure they're not out of reach. Men aren't made by Disney!
Relax, live your life, and the right guy will slip on in when you least expect it.
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