A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok for the past year me and a friend have been hanging out together at mine, theres always been flirting and a kiss. Recently its started to get more intimate. Now i told him a few weeks back that i liked him, and he said he didn't want a relationship so i was like ok thats fine. Then at the weekend we had a night out(we have the same group of friends) and he kept saying that he liked me and came back to mine but just cuddled. I think Im starting to develop feelings what do i do? do i say something or not?
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female
reader, Empressjai +, writes (30 May 2010):
 One thing i will stress to us girls...please please please listen to a guy when he says he doesn't want a relationship. He is being honest so accept the truth and if you think getting up close and personal will sway him...think again. He's ok having you as a 'friend' with all the benefits of a girlfriend so clearly this arrangement will benefit him but not you. These feelings that you are feeling wont get you anywhere and your bound to end up hurt by expecting him to change his mind by you declaring your feelings. All you represent to him is sex, easy no-strings, sex. What does he really know about you, your aspirations, your life goals or dreams? I guess nothing because he is only interested in what you have put onto his plate so easily.....sex.
Just because i guy has sex with you that doesnt mean he's in love with you, or he wants you to be his gf, or that he evens likes you that much. Guys can have sex with a girl without any emotional attachment which is why it is easier for guys to have sex and then walk away. Girls get attached and then want to form a bond to their sexual partner. This is why sex should be the last thing on your agenda when dating a guy. Hanging out is not dating and doesnt make him your bf either. Find some self-respect and ditch this guy because he will walk away the moment it suits him or his finds a girl more worthy of his commitment.
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