A
male
age
41-50,
*arrybaggs
writes:We work together in the same office. She likes to leave silly drawings on my desk, and has even drawn on my hands and arms at times (in front of other people). She can be quite touchy-feely and likes to hug me or pretend shove me. She texted me to wish me happy birthday recently (she got my cell number off someone else prior to this). The texts were really informal, calling me by my short name and had lots of x's in them. She even sent a text (the last one) consisting just of x's in them. When I saw her a few days later, she had a birthday card for me too.She's been working with me a little more of late, staying behind late at the office to help me out. One of our colleagues was leaving for a new job, and the girl asked me if I wanted us to put money together to get a gift and a card for the leaver. She didn't ask anyone else to contribute to it, despite there being 2 floors of employees. We have very similar humor and laugh a lot when we're together. She remembers jokes I made weeks before and stories I've told her but totally forgotten myself. She just puts me in a good mood.Also, at a seminar, our boss was discussing relationships in the workplace, and the girl asked a question about couples and used me and her as an example of a couple!I should highlight that she has a bf, and so I would not make a move on her. However, when she does talk about him, it's quite negative and critical of him. Also, she is very friendly, kind and outgoing to everyone.My question is, is she being friendly, harmless flirting, or is it more?Any help is welcomed.Thanks.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, babygirllovej  +, writes (1 November 2011):
 I would keep your distance from her where she is in a relationship. I don't think it is harmless flirting.
I imagine if you were her boyfriend; you wouldn't be so happy about her behavior with a co-worker. It's not very nice of her to sound so negative about her boyfriend. After all, he IS her boyfriend. If she is so unhappy with her boyfriend why doesn't she leave him? Talking bad about him behind his back is a disgraceful.
I wouldn't get tangled up in this mess if I were you. Be polite to her but keep your distance. It's not fair for her to drag you into something that could lead to an affair. Imagine if her boyfriend found out how she behaves towards you!
I would be cautious. Good Luck!
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