A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi I'll try keep this short , about four month ago I pulled a girl in town and we started to see each other, she wanted to take it slow so I agreed with her as I really liked her, it went downhill when I introduced her on a night out to my best mate, he was winding me up all night and I was biting.She basically took it the wrong way, and assumed I reacted how I did (I had to cart him away and tell him to calm down) because he was talking to her , which wasn't the case and I explained this to her. Anyway she was never the same after this, never texted me first, made no effort at all to see me and was liking some lads pictures on Facebook , and when I say that I'm not been a stalker or paranoid , I mean she liked every single picture he put up even of his skateboard , coincidently this lad appeared on her snap chat best friend list so she was obviously talking to him, maybe just mates who knows, but I thought it was a bit strange... So over the course of like two weeks she never texted me first.She made no effort to see me even if I arranged something to do.She would be busy or ill or tired every time, So on Halloween on a night out I bumped into her (after her texting me saying she can't see me cos she's with mates) we hugged not kissed which was weird cos normally we would be down each other's throats, and basically that was it. She disappeared into the night , so I text her saying 'look it doesn't feel like it's working I think it's best if we stop talking to each other' she went sick we had a row fell outShe texted me couple of days later basically saying I think you're right it isn't working it's best if we stay friends... so I ^^^^her off, deleted her snap chat, Facebook and number . Anyway after a month or not seeing or speaking to each other she text out of the blue saying 'such a nice lad and any girl is lucky to have you' and she wants to stay friends cos she said she's sorry for what ever she has done all if that... Anyway I re added her on snap chat and she start sending stuff on that , only the other day after snap chatting random shit she says 'my mum said it's a shame we didn't work out' So I said yeah I know it is, she said 'sorry :(' I replied with well why don't you do something about it , and she said like what?So I said, well depends how you feel about me, to which she said we need to chat in person ..... WHY ? I don't understand it, she told me before she still likes me but not as much, but would she be planning on letting me down gently again friend zoning me or does she want a another crack at it, I know all I have to do is wait but is rather have some insight on what to expect, cos to me it seems like just a big game -.- I'm meant to be meeting her after Xmas sometime
View related questions:
best friend, facebook, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2013): Well app she was properly in love with her ex before me , wich I obviously have reason to assume is the guy she was snap chatting, I know for a fact I'm to good for her just by the fact she came crawling back... I'm not prepared to play games ! But I do still really like her and want to try make it work but I know deep down (even my sister said) I'm her second option , asin she's failed with another lad and I'm her back up !! I don't know what to do , I want to fuck her off again but she re appeared in my life for a reason and I want to know why , yet I know she will fuck about when I want to meet her for this 'chat'
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (24 December 2013):
Exactly what the post below says. You were the spare. She like that other guy, and think you were kept around in case it went wrong. It probably did go wrong, and now she's back to you. I had an ex-girlfriend who thought she could dump me then remain friends, and she even tried to contact me years later. I made no reply whatsoever.
I don't know entirely what this girl is thinking. Perhaps she does want to give it another go. But, from experience, this screams that something else didn't work out, and she's back to you because you're the decent one. Problem is, she might wander off again. I think you're right about it being a game. You shouldn't bother playing it.
...............................
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (24 December 2013):
 When someone wants to take it slow, it usually means one of the two things: She just got out of a relationship and was still hurt, or she is still shopping around so nothing is definite yet. In this case it's the latter. You can assume she's after you now after the lad and her didn't work out. If she is reaching for you it could be guilty conscience and she didn't want you to think she had just dropped you like a hot potato. When you introduced her to your mate there is no misunderstanding. She liked him and put you on waiting list. They probably did something around Hallowween. She wanted it slow but she can't have it both ways. Wait when she's unsure then expect you to be committed when she's alone again.
You had been dating for 4 months and there was no plans for exclusivity. You can never trust her and wonder when she would disappear from your life again. She said you are such a nice lad, which is not exactly a compliment because it implies that you are nice enough to try again without questioning about the gap you had. I hope you know that you can still be a nice guy without giving her a try, and reblocking her again. Tell her she would be the unlucky one here.
...............................
|
