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Does she not want to get close? Should I hang around and fight for her or move on?

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Question - (22 May 2012) 2 Answers - (Newest, 22 May 2012)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

i wanna know if i should keep trying to fight for this girl i like.We have known each for about a year i have recently asked her to hang out with me twice. First time i asked her out she couldnt make it because she was gonna vist her grandma ( she told me before it might be an issue for us hanging out) i didnt mind she cancel on that one. But the second time i asked her she said " I dont want to plan anything And then let you down" I was pretty sad at that one ha ever since then we kinda havent be talking alot She has some i guess you could "realtionship

insecurities" and i was thinking maybe she doesnt want to get to close and get hurt ( just a theory). my Question to you wonderful people is should keep fighting for her or move on? :/

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (22 May 2012):

CindyCares agony aunt Move on, and fast. " I don't want to plan anything and then let you down " simply means " I don't want to plan anything with you ", period. Because when you plan something with a person, there's absolutely no need to let them down, short of earthquakes or other acts of God. You commit a chunk of your time to that person, and then you stick to your committment, that's all. Of course, you do commit your time if you are interested in hanging out with that person, - if you are not, you let anything and anybody interfere with your plans , or you refuse to make plans altogether.

As for the " not wanting to get close for fear of getting hurt " etc.etc, what can I say. It is a lifetime that I hear about it, and read about it, so maybe I can't totally exclude it as a possibility, but let me tell you, I have never, ever actually seen or met anybody who is very much into a person and will hold back " for fear of getting hurt ". Love, or lust :), makes all of us fearless, even foolishly reckless at times.

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A male reader, jasonvpn United States +, writes (22 May 2012):

I'd say move on bro. Stay friends, but move on. No point dangling around like a turd from an anus.She'll just shake you off.

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