A
female
age
36-40,
*lexia846
writes:I have a question and an opinion to ask of anyone here and if they could please help m out. I want to know if "love" between a man and a woman can really exist? Is it worth it to let someone in and really give 100% to the other individidual? I ask that because of my past.Three key factors have influenced this:I just got out of an emotional abusive relationship of five years a year and a half ago. and when i tell you i gave 100% i did.. I gave my body and soul, and even though I was highly educated and looked like a barbie for him at 25 , he put me down and very low till i broke and left.My parents relationship is also a mess. they have made it clear that they hate each other. it was physically abusive in the beggining from my dad when i was little, but now its is verbally abusive between them. The argue like animals and for 25years they refuse to change or even aknowledge change. They dont get divorced because they even have fought over who gets to keep the house. So basically they are comftably nimb and fighting.On the other hand my best friends mother and her dad have been otgether for 20 years. Her mother LOVES her father and holds him so high. The saddest part is we just found out he is having an affair online and panning to see the woman he was talking to .. Apparently this has been going on for a while..MY QUESTIONS IS: does love even exist? I mean it seems like you should never give 100% and honestly i though love was about going in full hearted.. I mean all these life lessons have been discouraging. whats the point.?
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affair, best friend, divorce Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2011): I think real love does exist. But I think that it is very rare to find it. Just like true friendship is very rare to find. My example of real love is my mom and dad. They married late, at 40 years old, and were never married before. They hurried to have me. Then my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. She fought for 11 years and then died.My father has a hard shell around him. But he came home from work at lunch every night to sit by her even for ten minutes and hold her hand and make sure she was okay. They argued about the house being messy a lot, and my dad has a big loud temper. Well, after she died he was alone for about four years. Then a friend of the family died and left his wife a widow. They started dating and now they are married so many years later. But, he sometimes cries and tells me how sorry he is about being mad at mom for not cleaning the house, and he misses her so much, and if only she was alive and they could be together. It's been 16 years since she died, and he still loves her and he doesn't love my step-mom, they are just together.... I think our society makes it hard. People keep seeing the grass looks greener with that man or that woman. People are broken and abused, so they abuse others. We have become very self-centered. Men are taught they have the right to want to be with as many women as they can. Women think it's okay to steal husbands, like a game or challenge.Real love is out there, but nearly impossible to find. :(
A
female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (26 September 2011):
 I realize that these three relationships are the ones that you have modeled what you think relationships are like because they are the examples closest to you. However, with 6 billion people on this planet, you must understand that logically, there are people out there with completely average, loving, non-abusive relationships. Those three examples are close to you so you can only model your own from what you've experienced. However, the world outside of your own perspective is much more massive and varied than what you've seen, when it comes to EVERYTHING, including relationships.
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A
male
reader, xsemenelinx  +, writes (26 September 2011):
 love do exist. i would like to share a nice quote from paulo coelho"You can’t preserve your emotions in formal. Love changes with time and discovers new ways of expressing itself.what ever you did in your past. gave everything what you have. its not about giving and seeing other's as long as you know you were at your best for loving and give a 101% of it.. BE GLAD BECAUSE NOT ALL PEOPLE EXPERIENCE THIS KIND OF FEELING AND I KNOW ITS EUPHORIA.. Im telling you this because i experienced it and you know what i think? im happy man becaause i experience the word REAL LOVE, COMPASSIONATE LOVE, and the ultimate SACRIFICE.. dont be sad because others treat you bad.. be glad because they miss a lot of you..take it one day at a time.. you will be happy. give me a message if you want an in depth explanation.. CHEERS!
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