A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:If a "good" long term, since childhood friend forgets to text or ask you how you are, you've been sick this week, in hospital overnight?Do you remind her you were sick when you see her Text her and tell her - needy Let her contact you and when you do see her dont bring it up, if she never asks guess she doesnt care and isnt a good friend Sorry but I feel hurt, as Id always text her within 2- 4 days of operation and see if she needs anything/is ok Feel like she doesnt care
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (27 September 2016):
 I would not bring it up. Bringing it up would not accomplish much and would not give you the answer you seek.
Suppose that you get this off your chest and you call her out on her indifference. Do you think that, if the reason why she never called , is because she does not care, she would come out and tell you : " You know, I did not call because I could not care less whether you are dead or alive " ? Obviously not. Whether she cares but she forgot, or she does not care at all , the reaction will be the same : she will act embarassed, and she will apologize. And you still would not know if the apologies are sincere.
With the difference though, that if she does care, she will feel actually bad , and also secretly annoyed for having promptly been rapped on her knuckles, after a lifetime of being a good friend, the one time she screwed up.
I guess maybe you should apply sort of a " 3 strikes you are out " rule . Not that you have to get hospitalized two more times to see if she is a good friend :).
But , let's say that if this is an once off, it does not mean anything. Everybody can forget stuff, even important. But then, if there's a second time, like she forgets to wish you happy birthday, or she " forgets " to invite to an event that she knows you'd love to attend, stuff like that- then you can start perking up your ears.
Then, if she does it again- 3 rd strike. She is not a good friend anymore, and keeps your relationship going out of habit, convenience, cowardice or ?.
A
male
reader, Denizen  +, writes (25 September 2016):
 The thing is my friend you can't see everything that is going on in another person's life. They could be coping with any kind of crisis: personal, domestic, real or imagined. So they neglected to ask about you? That's too bad. Nobody's perfect. If they are a true friend it won't matter in the long run because real friends cut each other some slack.
PS.
Hope you are feeling better now.
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