A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My gay bestfriend who strongly identifies as gay is very camp,dates ,flirts,hooks up ,cries over guys all the time ,said he wanted a family with a husband,he even drags,When we met we became close very fast,and spent a lot of time together,he was always particularly very flirty with me,we were very affectionate,hugs and kisses and constant pecks on the lips whenever we were out or hanging out.One night out we kissed with tongue out of the blue when we were drunk ,never discussed it after,and continued normally as friends.Then he went through this phase were he posted on his Facebook status how he hated men and was becoming partial to the occasional woman and how he needed puxxy on his next night out,he showed me and I asked him why he wrote it and he said he did it when he was drunk.I figured he was just pissed at men .He then started constantly making jokes about me and him having sex to me ,and constantly made offers in a joking tone to have sex with me ,and sexual innuendos ,he even sent me an audio in a deadpan voice simply saying he would have sex with me since he liked puxxy now, after I had told him I hadn't had sex since my ex months ago ,I brushed it off as a weird joke.He groped me several times,said my tits and ass looked good,held my hand ,when we went out ,or walked in public,be a little pissed at guys hitting on me,when I would tell him about other guys hitting on me he'ld say he cant blame them,we recently kissed again after a night out,I was drunk ,he wasn't and our friend saw us and she freaked out ,and yelled at him and told him she thought he was gay and he cried ?didn't explain why he did ? she interrogated him about the kissing and he said it was nothing out of the ordinary and that we did it all the time and that he was used to it and fine with it,and why she was making a big deal out of it,she asked him if he was BI ,he said he was offended she even asked and that it's not that hard to grasp he's gay he didn't like girls that way and never would ,he's been really quiet says he busy ?any answers?ive realised I really like this guy but beyond anything I want him to be happy and respect him and his sexuality ,I cherish our friendship and don't want to ruin it,is this all in my head is he just confused or curious or falling for me a little?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (7 July 2014):
 He sounds a bit desperate for affection and affirmation, to the point that he's acting like a teenage still struggling with his orientation and even how to behave to someone for whom he has fond feelings but not true sexual attraction.
I'd back off a bit for the time being and let him be 'busy.'
For what it's worth, I had some gay friends and acquaintances in various stages of coming out and becoming comfortable with being bi or gay or anything less than one hundred percent heterosexual. The ones with drink or drug problems sometimes did some very bizarre things under the influence but it didn't mean anything when they were sober.
I'd back off, time will tell.
By the way, saying he likes puxxy now doesn't mean that he's falling for you. It probably means he's still deciding what he does and doesn't find sexually attractive. I honestly would stay far far away from him when he's making the sexual innuendos. You sound like you like him on a different plane, as in a friend type of way with a crush thrown in, and you are going to be severely disappointed by a scattered confused and flighty guy who is still figuring out who and what he is.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2014): A) he probably is bisexual
B) platonic friends don't kiss or do anything partners do except hug occasionally. What you've both been doing HAS and IS ruining the "friendship". That stuff needs to stop NOW because it's blurring boundaries and no partner will be okay with it when either of you get one. Or will it stop then because you both know it's not what platonic friends do?
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