A
male
 ,
anonymous
writes:HiMy problem is I went out with my ex girlfriend for 6 months, 6 of the most magical months of my life, but by the end of the sixth she dumped me saying she needs time to sort out her priorities. I was upset but I recovered. It's been around about 5 weeks since she dumped me and I feel like I can move on. There's this girl I know, who all my mates say I should date, and I feel as if I should as a step to move on, but when I told my ex (who is literally a good friend now) that I was thinking about asking this other girl out, she replied saying "go ahead, I'm just in the past now aren't I?" I just don't get it, if she wants me why doesn't she tell me? I would go back to her any day but I'm confused on what she wants me to do? Plz help, thanxJames
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2005): I hope this doesn't sound insensitive, but it seems as though she may be craving the attention you give to her and the control that she exudes over you-the feeling and self inprotance that she can't have you back at any moment. It is flattering. The true test would be (as hard as it may seem-but trust me, I have been in your situation and this helped me sort through my feelings) for the 2 of you to take some time apart and let her know that you need to do so. If she wanted to be together, she would have spoken up by now. She doesn't want to lose you entirely, but she doesn't want to be tied down to you either.....she is using you as what is known as the "until something better comes along" partner. I know how much this hurts, but time ans space are the only things that will help to ease your pain. Who knows, maybe in this time apart you will find someone new who wants a relationship and you could end up happier than you were in your last relationship. I hope this helps and I hope my directness hasn't offended you.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2005): ok this is going to be tough but you are a guy are you not well first off try to talk to her ask her do you want me back ?and if she says no . then move on and if she changes her mind just ignore her and any thing she has to say . believe my guy friend did this to his ex the not listening part and it work she and her friends stopped calling him
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