A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am a couple of months out of a 3 year relationship with my ex-girlfriend. She says we lost the spark and have no chemistry anymore. I have been an emotional wreck for most of this period and my ex knows about it. A couple of weeks ago I decided to make some changes in my life. I am taking better care of my body and having a more positive outlook on life.One of these changes was to start seeing other people. I'm just casually checking out the field. I'm not trying to get into a serious relationship right now. There is a girl I have a couple of college classes with. We have been flirting back and forth for awhile. I recently ran into her at a bar while hanging out with some friends. I bought her a couple of drinks and we talked for about 30 minutes. I'm interested in going on a date but I'm taking my time, trying not to rush into it.My ex and I have been very open with each other since the breakup. We have a young son together so we decided it was best to remain friends or at least be nice to each other. When she started seeing another guy she was very open about her feelings when I would ask her. That relationship was brief but intense for her.She has been very curious about my new possibility. I told her about buying drinks and talking with the girl. Later that night she calls me up to tell me she is very upset at me. She said she feels jealous that I put in the effort for this girl but not for her. I told her I was not trying to purposefully hurt her. I learned from my mistakes with our relationship and am trying to be better with my future ones. She apologized and said it was a gut reaction and that she is happy for me.Does my ex still care for me or was her jealousy just a lingering attachment? Right now if my ex said she wants to give it another shot I would say yes. I know that I shouldn't string this other girl along. If my ex is just feeling jealous because of lingering attachments then I will move on and pursue this other girl.
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ex girlfriend, flirt, jealous, move on, my ex, period, spark Reply to this Question
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male
reader, eddie  +, writes (14 October 2008):
 It could be either. You can only try.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI understand what she is saying and if she would let me make it up to her I would. Right now I am trying to learn from my mistakes.
Is there still a chance for us or is it just left over feelings?
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A
male
reader, eddie +, writes (13 October 2008):
It sounds like her jealousy has some lingering attachment to the fact you weren't doing nice things for her. She seems to be saying she resents the fact you went out of your way to be nice with this other woman but you gave up trying to be nice to your ex. This is the "spark" she was referring to. You were going out of your way to be nice to the woman from college. This incident was you your ex saying..." if you had done that for me we might still be together..."
Never let the spark die. Someone else will always be willing to light it.
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